The Scientology engineers must have water proofed Stepford Katie’s hard drive and GPS tracking system, because here she is frolicking in the ocean with Suri without worrying that her operating system will malfunction causing her head to spin while her audio box repeats the secret code tattooed on Tommy Girl’s Scientolohole that opens the door to his basement dungeon. While Tommy Girl is working the soles off his fuck me raw heels on the set of Rock of Ages, Katie and Suri sunned themselves on the paparazzi’s flashes on the beach in Miami yesterday afternoon. Only Suri wouldn’t care about ruining her $5,000 custom-made Prada beach gown.
And is it just me, or is Stepford Katie’s belly button getting thicker and thicker? It’s a peen head button! It’s like Tommy Girl is making her use a penis pump on her belly button so he has something girthier to ride with his ass during their monthly Scientology-appointed intercourse ritual. And by “like” I mean he totally is.