And to answer your first question, the bus is fine.
Normally when you read about someone getting hit by a bus, you hope that everybody involved is okay. But when you read about Michael Lohan getting hit by a bus, you just have to bust out a: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Don’t worry, Michael Lohan didn’t get hurt or die. If he did, I’d have a few less HAs in there, okay? I’m not totally a freeze dried cunt.
TMZ reports that an L.A. metro bus wished Michael Lohan an early Father’s Day by smashing into his Jaguar yesterday afternoon. Apparently, the bus tried to pass Michael Lohan at a stoplight and sideswiped his car. Nobody was injured and Michael’s Jaguar barely has a few scratches on it
Michael Lohan gets hit by a bus, Lindsay Lohan regularly gets a train ran on her… I swear, the Lohans and public transportation …
But seriously, finally, years of White Oprah reenacting the “Regina George gets mowed over by a speeding bus” scene with a Michael Lohan voodoo doll (made from the dehydrated carcass of a sea turtle) have finally paid off! I am skeptical, though. If a fame whore gets hit by a bus in the middle of Hollywood and a paparazzo isn’t there to capture it, did it really happen?