Open Post: Hosted By Hugh Jackman & Neil Patrick Harris

June 13, 2011 / Posted by:

It’s a fact that every time I compliment a ho on this side, I earn a “kindly take a step back from the front of Hell’s entrance line” citation, so I will carefully say that Neil Patrick Harris’ hosting skills are the opposite of James Franco’s. I will also very carefully say that if the Not-So Ambiguously Gay Duo of Hugh Jackmeoff and NPH chose to do the Tony Awards production number above again next year while completely naked and slathered in strawberry Crisco, I would not send a letter of complaint to CBS.

And lastly, I will say that Brooke Shields is going to need a bigger paper when she begins performances in The Addams Family musical next week, because I’m pretty sure Morticia has more than just three lines and ho obviously has the memory of a crackhead goldfish with Alzheimers.

Phew. I think I did that without getting one citation (I think). My place in Hell’s line is safe!

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