Jennifer Connelly And Paul Bettany Are Parents Again
Jennifer Connelly gave birth to her third child and Paul Bettany's second at their home in New York City on May 31st and they had themselves one of those Slip 'N Slide births.
Jennifer's rep tells UsWeekly that she birthed out a daughter they named Agnes Lark Bettany during a planned home water birth in a birthing pool. The rep then issued the usual ole' canned response by saying they're all happy, they're all healthy and they're all covered in a dried thin layer of placenta water.
Ricki Lake's documentary on birthing babies made me believe that pushing out your womb refugee over a kiddie pool in your living room is the way to go. There's no fluorescent lights and no nurses trying to shave your poon before it's about to explode. You get to be Erykah Badu for a day by letting out your inner earth mother as you waddle and moan around your own house. You can get real and you can get ugly without judgements. And if you want to make sure that your newborn comes out with its eyes firmly shut, just let your man nibble on the nipple a bit.
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literarylioness on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:39pm.
The worse part was how other mothers wouldn't talk about their kids being ugly at birth. It was this huge secret that no one talked about. We could talk about the drugs, the tears, the poop, vaginal versus c-section, but newborn ugliness was a huge no no. It's not like I don't love my sons just because they came out unattractive.
Babies are like unformed, smooshy clay when they are newborns. I don't think I've EVER seen a 'gorgeous' newborn baby (I'm not saying they don't exist, I'm just saying I've never seen one lol). Once my daughter's head and nose went back to normal she was one of the most adorable babies evah (this, coming from her mother of course, ha-ha). My daughter started to really look precious by the age of 9 months and people would stop me just to tell me how cute she was (gawrsh) when I was out in public with her. I dressed in in a lot of really cute outfits (mostly cute little onesy OshKosh B'Gosh® overalls for girls because she HATED dresses).
Yes, Virginia...there are ugly babies and that's OKAY!!!!!
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Koko,
I actually watched that film with my mom (many regrets!), and we had an argument because I was saying that her pimp was not all that bad-looking, and if she had to fuck him for heroin, it could be worse.
She stood firm on he was absolutely hideous.
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GERONIMO!
Submitted by Centaurious on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:06pm.
Whenever I see her all I can think about is that dildo scene in "Requiem for a Dream."
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Me too. I'm also reminded of an ex boyfriend who loved watching that scene over and over again. Which is creepy enough.
Submitted by Fraggle on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 1:52pm.
literarylioness on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 1:39pm.
ROTFL! Yer killin' me and I totally agree. My daughter was born with a cone-head (because my labor was so long, her head sat in the birth canal and elongated her soft lil' skull), she also had a smooshed up nose because the already aforementioned.
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OMG! How did I forget the coneheads? My first one came out alright, but the second one was really bad with that. My first twin had a bit of acne, but the other one not as much. Their biggest problems were wrinkles and fuzz.
The worse part was how other mothers wouldn't talk about their kids being ugly at birth. It was this huge secret that no one talked about. We could talk about the drugs, the tears, the poop, vaginal versus c-section, but newborn ugliness was a huge no no. It's not like I don't love my sons just because they came out unattractive.
Whenever I see her all I can think about is that dildo scene in "Requiem for a Dream."
I wonder if Paul feels the same?
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GERONIMO!
She had her breasts reduced. Then became a stick figure.
You mean...you're supposed to stop breast-feeding? *Puts breast pump down and calls daughter with the bad news.*
I guess I'll have to sell the rest on ebay to Mike.
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Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 2:02pm.
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lol! you neglected to mention how you breastfed them all until they were seven - longer if they needed it - and are a BIG advocate of co-sleeping/sleep sharing.
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IrishFury on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 2:02pm.
But, did you ORGASM? That is the burning question.
I'm beginning to believe birthin' orgasms are as rare as unicorns, fairies and straight actors.
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I had all my kids in the middle of the jungle with a few naturopaths humming old, pagan tunes.
Afterward we roasted the placentas and ate them, along with an organic cucumber juice and figs.
My uncircumcized children (Raine, River, Storm and Frosty the Snowman) are unvaccinated and homeschooled and doing beautifully, all while making their own fair trade hemp clothing and campaigning every weekend to save Tibet.
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Dark-sided!
literarylioness on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 1:39pm.
ROTFL! Yer killin' me and I totally agree. My daughter was born with a cone-head (because my labor was so long, her head sat in the birth canal and elongated her soft lil' skull), she also had a smooshed up nose because the already aforementioned.
I totally forgot about the 'peach fuzz' all over their bodies too. Oh...and 'cradle cap'...my poor daughter had the worst case of cradle-cap...UGH...nasty...crusty...
She also had a horrible case of infant acne which turned out to be a food allergy. I was eating foods she was allergic to (peanuts and eggs). Back before there was a lot of awareness about peanut allergies (and how DEADLY they can be), I had no idea what was going on with my child until I took her to a specialist in Seattle and they gave us ALL skin tests (where they prick you and then put a teensy drop of a known allergen on your skin to see if you have a reaction). I'm allergic to grass, weeds and dust. My daughter is allergic to peanuts and eggs. My husband is allergic to tree pollen. YAY. ugh
There's a happy ending to this though! The allergy specialist said that if we kept peanuts and eggs out of her diet until she was 18, that she would outgrow her allergies. Well, low and behold, she can eat peanuts now (even though she was deathly allergic to them as a child) and she LOVES eggs and can eat all she wants without any bad reactions.
Okay, okay. I *do* trust some doctors...I don't hate 'em all and I respect that it has to be a really hard profession. Think about the people of Wal-Mart and having to be those people's doctor. UGH
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Submitted by Fraggle on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:55pm.
Ugh. That reminds me about 'vernix' (that white, waxy coating on a baby when they are born which protects their skin). My midwife was a huge believer in using that as a face and body cream/moisturizer. I don't even want to know if she kept mine. She probably sold it to Madonna. GAH!
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Hey, why doesn't anyone talk about that? Babies are really wrinkly and ugly when born. My two looked like greasy old men when they came out. My doctor assured me this was "normal."
OMG! What about the hair? Mine had that fine dark "natal" fuzz that was gross.
I had this picture of them being like the ones on soap operas. All fresh and cute and about three months old.
AGNES?
*blank stare* *crickets*
AGNES????????? Fuck!!!!!!!!
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"I'd hate to have to go around thinking of health & shit like that." Keith Richards, 1997
She was voluptuous? You mean boobie-wise?
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She was thicker built and bigger busted in her earlier films. Now she is a stick and I thought she looked prettier with the extra weight, she can tend to look gaunt now. But I think there is so much pressure to be super thin in Hollywood.
parissucksliterally on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:46pm.
I'd want to have a 1950's birth. Knock me out cold, and wake me when the baby is clean. :)
LOL! That's almost dreamy sounding...you wake up in a slight haze after it's all over with a cute little baby suckling on your nipple.
Ugh. That reminds me about 'vernix' (that white, waxy coating on a baby when they are born which protects their skin). My midwife was a huge believer in using that as a face and body cream/moisturizer. I don't even want to know if she kept mine. She probably sold it to Madonna. GAH!
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Mad respect to you mcnightmare.
I'm not going to google what a fourth degree tear is...it sounds awful enough for my imagination to fill in the blanks. Poor baby. :( Some of you are going to make me cry with your harrowing stories.
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I'd want to have a 1950's birth. Knock me out cold, and wake me when the baby is clean. :)
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Don't scream about, don't think aloud
Turn your head now baby
Just spit me out
Chris Eccleston... on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:37pm.
If men had to give birth, they'd use all the world's resources to figure out a way to make women do it. Fucking men. Fuck men and their fucking sperm.
Actually, I'd love to use all of the world's resources just to figure out a way to enable men to give birth to babies. I'da totally had a couple more if that were possible. My husband woulda quit his bitchin' about me only poppin' out one if I had that option! lmao
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Submitted by Bunny Rabbit on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:13pm.
Interesting about the drug free birth. I had both my kids in major metro areas and both times, the doctors were estatic and supportive that I wanted to go drug free.
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I think it depends on a lot of factors. I was a high risk pregnancy. I am large, was having twins, and it was a "geriatric" first delivery. Most of the doctors just wanted to cut them out.
Congrats to them. How lovely.
I have mad respect for women who choose to do natural/drug-free births, but when (if) my turn comes, I'll be demanding all the drugs I can get my hands on. That's just because I love drugs though.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Uvy, I feel you on the tear thing. mine was a fourth-degree tear. One of the idiot medical students took a look and said - "you may have problems holding your bowel movements when you're older." smartass. just a little FYI, I guess. so far I have been able to avoid the adult diapers, though.
I'm a Badu/Hill style mama at heart, so I had planned to have my son at home, but got guilt-tripped into having a bunch of medical intervention because of diabetes. watching "The Business of Being Born," I realize I am still kinda bitter about that.
anyway, mine was a mix of medical and natural birth. no pain meds (though they kept pushing them on me), but labor was induced with pitocin. on all fours with my female friends for a lot of the labor, but slammed onto my back when they realized what was happening, surrounded by 15 people, cut with a knife and screamed at for the last push.
if i had it all to do again, i'd give birth at my friend's farm in Santa Cruz.
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Submitted by Fraggle on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:24pm.
If men had to give birth...hahahaha
If men had to give birth, they'd use all the world's resources to figure out a way to make women do it. Fucking men. Fuck men and their fucking sperm.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Night Owl on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:24pm.
I worked with her on a film, she came to the bar where we hung out and was so nice, I like her. But I think she looked prettier when she was more voluptous.
How cool! It's neat when you hear stories of celebrities being down-to-earth instead of high-riding pricks [i.e. goopster].
She was voluptuous? You mean boobie-wise? Sometimes birthing babies can really be tragic on the fun-bags. Gravity and birthin' can wreak all kinds of havoc on the female figure. ;(
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ISprainedMyUvula on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:18pm.
That is some brave fierceness! How scary. Women who go through that kind of traumatic delivery deserve a major award. Soldiers get the purple heart...why can't mothers get the pink heart or something? God bless all you moms who have had hard deliveries.
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Bree
you are doing it the right way it does take time
http://www.dogproblemsolutions.com/how_stop_dog_whining.php
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
I worked with her on a film, she came to the bar where we hung out and was so nice, I like her. But I think she looked prettier when she was more voluptous.
Chris Eccleston... on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:14pm.
Thank you, Chris. :) The kitty in my avatar could almost be a long lost twin of my Scottish Fold (who died in 2009). I agree, dlisted and kittehs are symbiotic and I love that Michael K. loves on the feline friends.
kokoskitten on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:14pm.
Solly. Hopefully you young women aren't so traumatized for life that you'll never have children. Giving birth is pretty graphic and intense and there's no way to candy-coat it. If men had to give birth...hahahaha
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Fraggle- Aside from having a fucking melon of DOOM, it was almost a forced vag delivery because the cord was around his neck twice. In order to avoid a c-section, I was told I had three pushes to get him out. He was basically ripped outta there by vacuum. My OB had her knee on the table and was leaning back to it and everything to get him out.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
I'm planning on it so I'm glad to see I'm doing something right! lol next week he goes back for his last round of puppy boosters, then two weeks from that I'm going to sign up for puppy classes at Petco.
He's like yours, but only part Chihuahua (Chihuaha/Poodle mix) and he does really well in his crate at night (doesn't cry at all unless he has to poop) and his crate isn't even in my bedroom, but as soon as I leave the house he is a nightmare. I guess I just have to keep practicing or I'll be a prisoner in this house forever! Thanks for the encouragement!
ISprainedMyUvula on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:03pm.
OMG. :( My midwife did a specialized massage technique so I wouldn't tear... As Boo was crowning, I'll never forget my midwife reaching up there and saying, "Oh no worries. You have plenty of room." Ahem. 'scuse me, lady? Did you just say I have big vagina?
HA! Giving birth is definitely very humbling.
Sorry. Had to edit. One of my sentences was totally incomprehensible.
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Alright I can officially skip this thread after reading a few comments. Fried placenta and the mommy mafia out in full force is enough for me.
Fraggle, I <3 your av! The internet and kitties go together like lube and condoms!
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Submitted by literarylioness on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:52am.
First, not everyone shits on the table. Sure, some do, but not all....... Third, we have WAY too many c-sections in the United States! It took me a while to find a doctor who would let me have a drug free birth. A lot of doctors are afraid of malpractice and yes I had doctors who offered me an elected c-section.
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When it comes to shitting on the table, you either can get an enema during early labor or you can shit on the table. Some doctors actually prefer you shitting on table because when you have an enema during labor, your poop's consistency makes it, um, harder to clean. If you poop on the table, the shit is usually hard and easier to whisk away. Yeah...learned all this during the birth plan.
Interesting about the drug free birth. I had both my kids in major metro areas and both times, the doctors were estatic and supportive that I wanted to go drug free.
by Bree o
take classes with the puppy most local petco have them cheap, I did not with my first but I have done a lot of research for the second one, the whining will go away it takes a while, it was the worse about training, crate train him so he wont poop in your house, is it hard to keep him locked up but it works
with my first he would not let me sleep crying, now he doesnt even bark and he is a chihuahua
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Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 12:03pm.
My vagina hurts just reading that...wow.
No episiotomy but I did tear, so badly with my first that my OB had to redo my stitches three times because I bled through them.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
paul has a HOT BOD, but the face is meh...
but hay, id still hit it.
My grammar/spelling are atrocious today. Sorry...trying to multi-task and failing miserably but I'm not going to hit Edit to fix my typos.
AND OMG...! Pan searing and eating a placenta? Isn't that almost cannibalistic? Ugh. *fights wave of nausea*
My midwife asked if I wanted to keep the placenta and bury it under a tree. I was a NO TAKER on that offer. I had to laugh the way she admired it and made special note that there were no calcium deposits on it. I craved nectarines like crazy when I was pregnant so that's the only thing I can chalk up to my healthy placenta. lol
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They named their daughter Agnes?
Is it the year 1953 or something????
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:46am.
If you saw that movie, you DEFINITELY would have remembered it. Not just for the dildo scene, either, although it was quite memorable.
I was traumatized by that movie. It was harrowing. (In a good way, though)
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I youtubed bits and pieces and I'm sure I haven't seen it but I will now.
I remember watching Christiane F as a teenager and to me that was one of the best "don't do heroin" movies I've seen...even with the shitty english dubbing
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:19am.
Whiskey Tango -- someone put a picture of the her placenta on FaceBook? WTF? Unfuckingbelievable. People are really sick. And I thought the pregnancy glamour shots were sickening.
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I know. It was definitely one of those NSFW things. yeah yeah, we know...you're the only person in the world to have a baby. Ever. In the whole history of the world.
I am curious, but frightened at the same time, to see how the next generation of kids born to facebook oversharers will turn out. My guess is that they'll hate their parents' guts for immortalizing "My First Poop!!!" photos of them on the interwebz.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
yepyepyep on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:44am.
If I ever get pregnant I will get a midwife my bf doesn't believe me, but I hate the idea of hospitals and unnecessary drugs and all the things that they feed the baby that crap from china (similac). (I am crazy I know) but I want to live as clean as possible
I totally get you. There are a lot of us Hospital/Doctor/Pharma phobic people. You are not alone. Midwives are awesome...just be sure to really look into their history and experience. My midwife went on to earn her degree in gynecology. My sister gave birth to her third child at my midwifes facility in her home. She said it was night and day compared to her first two hospital deliveries where they basically treat you like cattle.
Hekki, my mom pooped on the delivery table when she delivered my sister. Shit happens. No shame in that. If you tense up it just makes your labor last longer.
My daughter poo'd in me a little before she was born... My midwife joked, "Well, at least that's one thing we can check off the healthy baby list". LOL!
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First, not everyone shits on the table. Sure, some do, but not all. Second, giving birth is different for every woman. I wanted a home birth, but do to my age, size, and having twins, it was recommended that I go the hospital route. I didn't shit on the table and it was not as bad as what so many women had told me. Third, we have WAY too many c-sections in the United States! It took me a while to find a doctor who would let me have a drug free birth. A lot of doctors are afraid of malpractice and yes I had doctors who offered me an elected c-section.
I want to know how Jennifer Connolly got the approval for a home birth at her age. I really admire that she went that route, because that's what I wanted to do.
Yepyep, thanks I sure hope so! I've had him for about a month now and I never realized how hard the potty training would be (every dog I've ever owned was an older rescue dog, never had one this small!).
The separation anxiety is also hard. I've been trying to get him used to being alone by going to get the mail, going to the grocery store, etc. and laving him alone for small amounts of time but every time I come home he is howling his head off (and I live in an apartment complex).
I'm thinking about getting some books or taking some classes so I can train him better, I know he's a baby and it's mostly me not knowing what I'm doing and not being able to teach him the right things.
I just remember my two year old nephew being easier...yeah he didn't listen a lot of the time, but he knew what I was saying! lol
y Bree
Puppies get easier after the 1st year after the second you are set, my dog is 7 and I want to get another but not looking forward to that 1 st year
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
Submitted by Whamo: "Requiem for a Dream.
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I remember the title but I don't remember watching it and I've watched hundreds upon hundreds of movies.
I must have seen it but I don't remember the dildo scene which makes me think I missed it cause I think I would have remembered a JC dildo scene. lol"
If you saw that movie, you DEFINITELY would have remembered it. Not just for the dildo scene, either, although it was quite memorable.
I was traumatized by that movie. It was harrowing. (In a good way, though)
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 11:41am.
Chris -- OMG, I think that's the sickest thing I've ever heard, fried placenta. Were they hillbillies or cannibals or something? Who could be so sick?
I'm pretty sure they were hippies. She had a home birth and when she birthed her placenta, her midwife (sister? I can't remember) washed it off and froze it. Then I think a year later, they defrosted it and ate it. Said it tasted like beef.
.....
Excuse me while I go puke.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Re: Hospital births vs homebirth.
Let's just be grateful we have options, okay? Everyone can choose what they like and be happy.
Do I think there are too many C-sections and unnecessarily frightened women? Yes. I lean toward Ricki's viewpoint, but I think the truth is somewhere in the middle.
In the end, I think a woman has to be comfortable with her choices and they should be respected.
Fraggle on
If I ever get pregnant I will get a midwife my bf doesn't believe me, but I hate the idea of hospitals and unnecessary drugs and all the things that they feed the baby that crap from china (similac). (I am crazy I know) but I want to live as clean as possible
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
what a good looking couple!!! CONGRATS!!! Mazel Tov
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"low self esteem is a bitch"...