Open Post: Hosted By Tonje Langeteig
Speaking of feminist icons…
Norway has delivered some real talent to this planet by giving us an orange-glazed unicorn who has a whiny voice like Roseanne with tiny helium tanks strapped to her vocal cords and sexy facial expressions like Paris Hilton trying to push her jumbo tampon out without hands! Rebecca Black get into the backseat permanently, because Tonje Langeteig is here to forever entertain us and scratch a layer of our souls off at the same time.
Never mind that when Tonje masturbates she’s committing pedophilia (“I’m a pretty girl trapped inside a grownup’s body“), she has changed my mind about wanting to be a cast member on The Real Crappy Housewives of Brooklyn. That used to be my goal in life, but not anymore. Now I want to be just like Tonje and go to clubs by the docks in the middle of the afternoon to awkwardly shuffle on an empty dance floor with white rappers who should be seeking treatment for their chronic seizures instead of rapping. That is the life!
via WOW Report (Thanks to everybody who sent this in!)