NBC summoned a wave of dry panties when they failed to secure Christopher Meloni for the next season of Law & Order: SVU. Christopher Meloni is packing up his sleeveless button down shirts and leaving Mariska Hargitay without a partner for now. Mariska, who is making season 13 her last, released a farewell open letter to Christopher Meloni last night and included a curious statement that is making me analyze this shit through Detective La Toya’s magnifying glass eyes.
“For the past 12 years Chris Meloni has been my partner and friend, both on screen and off. He inspired me every day with his integrity, his extraordinary talent and his commitment to the truth. I love him deeply and will miss him terribly – I’m so excited to see what he’ll do next.”
COMMITMENT TO THE TRUTH?! Doesn’t that slightly resemble the little comment Maria Shriver made to Oprah after Arnold Schwarzenegger’s secret love child parachuted into the media? What does it all mean? Does that mean there’s a secret love child crawling around out there with biceps like Meloni’s and an elegant side part like Mariska’s? Eh. No. It’s probably some kind of inside joke. You know, Mariska walked into Meloni’s trailer one day when he was in the middle of flexing his rock hard ass muscles in the mirror. Mariska said “nice tush,” but since she just had dental surgery it sounded like, “nice twuth.” So it’s a running joke of theirs. “Commitment to the tush” makes so much more sense than “commitment to the truth.”