Bitch Is Banned From Japan

May 22, 2011 / Posted by:

With all the tsunami, earthquakes and other disasters, the country of Japan decided that its people have suffered enough so they crossed Russell Brand’s name off of their guest list and did not allow him into the magical land of rainbow-wrapped fuckery. Russell tried to join his wife Katy Perry in Tokyo for her world tour, but Japan wasn’t having it. They told him sayo-fucking-nara and said that the closest he’s ever going to get to Japan is the sushi section at Todai. The reason was because of some illegal shit Russell did ten years ago. This is what Katy Perry Tweeted last night:

I’M SO EXCITED! I’M IN MY FAVORITE PLACE IN THE WORLD! #JAPAN!!! #CALIFORNIADREAMSTOUR!!!
13 hours ago

So…my husband just got deported from Japan. I am so. sad. I brought him all this way to show him my favorite place #tokyodreamscrushed
10 hours ago

It was for priors from over 10 years ago! #mamanothappy! #don’tmessw/mahman! #uwannaplaylet’sgo #don’ttakeawomansmanfromhershe’llgetshiasty!
10 hours ago

…But of COURSE I ♥ my Japanese fans & the show #MUSTGOON no matter the daily aftershocks or husband kidnappings! #it’snotrightbutit’sokay
10 hours ago

#FREE@RUSTYROCKETS! RT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
10 hours ago

Russell didn’t seem to upset about it in his Tweet about this mess: “Planning escape from Japanese custody. It’s bloody hard to dig a tunnel with a chopstick.”

But the joke is really on Japan, because Russell got into the country the next day by using Nancy McKeon’s passport.

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