As Jon Cryer throws the same look of uncertainty I make when my sister takes me to a vegan restaurant and Angus T. Jones laughs at the insane amount of money he’s fucking making right now (he does that a lot), Ashton Kutcher thinks about the treasures he’s going to find buried in Charlie Sheen’s old trailer (a silicone vagina filled with 8-balls, a hooker’s right leg, who knows…).
Jon, Ashton and Angus gathered together at the CBS upfronts in NYC yesterday as the new cast of the next (and probably last) season of Two and a Half Men. Yeah, I know people are saying that CBS should just bury Two and a Half Men in the octagon next to Charlie Sheen’s sanity, but let these hos make as much money as they can while it’s still possible. Jon Cryer needs to buy more shiny suits. Ashton needs to buy Demi Moore a new face and a new pair of heat-resistant nipples. And Angus needs more money to drown the image of Charlie Sheen snorting yellow cocaine off of a gorilla’s pec while a midget porn star threw multicolored mini marshmallows at his asshole in his trailer. So more money for them! I can still hate. But I can’t fully hate.
And is it just me, or does this picture look like the three stages of a male-to-female sex change (you decide who goes with which stage).