Lindsay Lohan Has A Stalker
Yes, I know the picture above looks like Michael Lohan in the Gerard Butler fat suit he wears to disguise himself as her drug dealer's collector so he can milk a few more extra coins out of his daughter. But it isn't! Lindsay Lohan Tweeted the picture of a man she says is a Freemason who has been threatening to murder her 4 years. He could be the one who murdered her career, so we should take this very seriously!
LiLo also Tweeted this little note asking her fans to stand by her during this very dangerous time in her life.
This is the freemason stalker that has been threatening to kill me- while he is TRESPASSING! im actually scared now- the blood in the 'cults' book was too much- all my fans, my supporters, please stand by me. g-d bless xxL
I love that she pulled an O out of God. Lindsay Lohan will take a crack needle to her veins, but she will never EVER take God's name in vain even when she's not taking God's name in vain at all. But on to more important matters like Lindsay Lohan's life!
A source (White Oprah should just legally change her name to "source" already) tells TMZ that LiLo thinks her Freemason stalker has been following her for 4 years. He leaves strange gifts at her front door and regularly sends her crazy text messages. LiLo doesn't know the name of her stalker but she's hoping that the police can help to keep him away.
This womp womp bitch is a mess. She tries to take a restraining order out against a paparazzo who's been following her around for a week, yet it's taken her for 4 years to take action (that's if you count Tweeting as taking action) against a Freemason stalker? Why would I not be surprised if this dude is really a meter reader and the strange gift he's been leaving her is a past due notice from the electric company? "OH MY G(CENSOR)D! He's punching numbers into a strange grey box on the side of the house! QUICK, ALI! Call 911* while I Tweet!"
* 911 is actually Lindsay Lohan's dial code for Radar Online.
• 
Jack and Sweetas haven't done nude-time yet because last Fri night Sweetas and I were having a couple of wines o'er the internet and I asked her if Jack's thing was big and she said she didn't know because she hadn't seen it yet.
I sound like Vicki Pollard. Yes but no but yes but shu' up, stop givin me evils!
Anyway, just an FYI to all who follow the 'Jackas' situation.
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Dark-sided!
Why doesn't she just change her number if the guy texts her? Would that just make too much sense?
Maybe he doesn't want to kill her. Maybe he just wants to plug her Eastern Star?
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Yeah, Fuck it.
Submitted by yepyepyep on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:39am.
Anyways this probably means LL will be dead soon, notice how some celebrities predict their deaths?
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Since Linds will never get clean or give a damn about working she might as well go the early death route to immortality.
Then we can have tributes about the troubled young actress whose promising career was cut short in her prime. And Ali can come into her own as the really talented Lohan.
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twerk those stumps!
lindsaylohan Lindsay Lohan
This is the freemason stalker that has been threatening to kill me- while he is TRESPASSING! im actually scared now-... http://say.ly/EwykBl
2 hours ago »
lindsaylohan Lindsay Lohan
RT @Mdmolinari "Watching The Kills From The DJ Booth ( Elle Dee) W/ @lindsaylohan " @ Chateau on #viddy viddy.it/ieegID
2 hours ago
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
I think we should take up a collection to get some lethal weapons for this freemason so he can take her ugly, stanky ass out for good once & for all. I'm in for $2 -- come on peeps, this is for a worthy cause!!!
*reports Jack to the Freemasons/Illuminati*
Daisy was wondering why Raul talks in the third person
Whatever, he's probably just the UPS guy. Mine always leaves stuff on my doorstep, too.
louise LMAO Keeeeeeeeefer!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
If any normal person had a stalker, (much less an attention whore) they will call the cops and etc etc etc
posting a picture of said "stalker" will be the last thing I would do.
Anyways this probably means LL will be dead soon, notice how some celebrities predict their deaths?
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
I see she graduated from the Perez Hilton School of How To Tweet For Help Instead of Summoning the Authorities.
Dumb attention whore.
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Sit on my face and tell me that you love me...
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:36am.
Noooooo Im almost positive she did say the club name I just forgot what it was!!! Arent they oh so intelligent?
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
EEG AHAHAHAHAHHA ROTFLMAO!!!!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
What in the hell is lindsey going on about now?? The fuck is she talking about "freemason...cult" shit?? And, yes, the dude is probably a meter reader leaving her bills at the door but the dumb bitch can't read unless the words are made of powder, so. I bet this is a cry out to Sam, who is ignoring the shit out of her. Fking crazy.
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"When all I could hear was the thunder of gunshots and smell the violence in the air...my thoughts were so clear...three words went through my mind endlessly: you're so cool, you're so cool, you're so cool." -Alabama to Clarence, True Romance (1993)
Oh Lord, somebody got drunk and pulled up Vigilant Citizen on them there interwebs.
LINDSAY WILL BE THE NEXT ILLUMINATI BLOOD SACRIFICE!!!
We should be so lucky. Funny how after the blogs out her for stalking SamRo and JFranc, now all of a sudden SHE has a stalker. A FREEMASON to boot. Chile, please.
*eyeroll to heaven, hell and back*
IN OTHER NEWS: Rob tweeted a picture of me yesterday and said "This is the Dlisted Whore who has been stalking me for the last 10 years! guys I'm SCARED!!!!"
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:28am.
LMAOOOOO MK!!!!
why the whole Freemason angle?
TEAM FREEMASON!!!
he looks like Jenelle's bf on Teen Mom 2
LMAO!!! Keifer's secret identity as a Freemason has been revealed! That's why he was able to "go anywhere and get a job doing anything" without a high school diploma.
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:30am.
ditquoi seriously! blood in cults books sounds like something comingback would say!
lol...yeah I've read that sentance a few times now and I still don't fully understand what the hell she was talking about, which clearly implies she was in the throes of some sort of high.
I don't know what kind of high, because I haven't done many drugs, but it seems like at least coke...since there's a whole lot of typing there and very little sense-making.
edited: Louise Brooks opined that it's meth so I'll go with her analysis.
weezy - sounds like you need more Jesus in your life, I will pray for you.
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
Submitted by Pamela on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:27am.
One of her dumbass friends twitter "@the club with @LindsayLohan the same exact time she tweeted she was oh so skerd! What a loser this bitch is!
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LMAO! OK, I know she didn't say which club, but still! Rule #1 of being stalked is to make sure you/your friends tweet your whereabouts online. Obviously!
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Raul has a strange gift he'd like to leave at her front door, can Raul borrow your lighter?
I see you galavanting around town with damsel I admire and I propose Copulate Thyself ..and Copulate Her additionally! http://thechive.com/2011/05/05/daily-afternoon-randomness-48-photos-16/1...
Submitted by ditquoi on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:30am.
the real losers are the shit for brains fans who are forming a prayer circle for her right now.
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Ahhhhhhhhhhhh that shit makes me want to tear my damn hair out! WTF is wrong with people! Thats what is fucked up with America! People idolizing pieces of dog shit like her!
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
All my supporters, stand by me, g-d bless
Is that rehab speak, anyone?
Hey Mr. Freemason stalker dude, please please:
BE ADEQUITE
Seal the deal already on this piece of shit.
When someone starts going on about the Freemasons, blood cults, shitty stalkers (LMAO nanners), God and the Devil, you can be pretty sure they are on meth.
Or my mother in-law.
LOL at Rob germs... hahahahahahahahaahaa
weekend is approaching, things are looking UP.
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:28am.
It figures that Lindsay's stalker is as successful as she is.
Linds threw in the term "Freemason" to sound intelligent.
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twerk those stumps!
LOL Jack, not good considering all the Rob shit yesterday,LOL
I wouldn't let him touch me since I had Rob germs all over my body!
How about your sex life?
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
4 years? He's not very good then, is he?
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Yeah, Fuck it.
ditquoi seriously! blood in cults books sounds like something comingback would say!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
This is definitely some illumanti shit. Randy Quaid, please weigh in.
Snowy, how is your relationship going?
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
LOL @ "Why would I not be surprised if this dude is really a meter reader and the strange gift he's been leaving her is a past due notice from the electric company?"
And how does she know he's a Freemason? Those guys are the most secretive folks ever. He probably works for Tree Masters and she read his work shirt wrong.
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"Who put a blonde wig and red lipstick on Toucan Sam?" (Nicole)
More like Freebaser not Freemason.
Anyway, fuck this stupid attention whore. Call the cops if he is such a threat, don't fucking Tweet for attention!
Submitted by Pamela on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 9:27am.
Not to mention (yeah I know way to much about this bitchs twitter) She tweeted this while she was at the club with someone! One of her dumbass friends twitter "@the club with @LindsayLohan the same exact time she tweeted she was oh so skerd! What a loser this bitch is!
the real losers are the shit for brains fans who are forming a prayer circle for her right now.
The fact that she has a stalker makes met wet with anticipation. Maybe this one will seal the deal and end her existence on this earth!
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Is she confusing a Freemason with something else?
Maybe she thinks he's a Freebaser stalker? IDK.
If he IS a Freemason, how does she know this, and wouldn't that be be great info to give the police??? G-d!
and wtf blood in what cults book? is she talking about crack? :P
LMAO at Nanners!!!! I agree, what a shitty stalker!! hahahahahahahaaa LOOOOOOOOOOZERRRRR!!!
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
All any stalker needs is a dimebag and a bottle of vodka and Lindsay will follow them. Lindsay was partying with Manson a few days ago so I just take this a junkie paranoia. I hope this dude is a utility worker and that he sues the fuck out of her for posting his picture on Twitter and slandering him as a stalker.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
Lindsay is proof that money trumps Darwinism. Why call 911 when you can tweet your crackhead/tween followers for help?
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
LMAOOOOO MK!!!!
why the whole Freemason angle?
TEAM FREEMASON!!!
he looks like Jenelle's bf on Teen Mom 2
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
Not to mention (yeah I know way to much about this bitchs twitter) She tweeted this while she was at the club with someone! One of her dumbass friends twitter "@the club with @LindsayLohan the same exact time she tweeted she was oh so skerd! What a loser this bitch is!
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
Good luck to the freemason, God speed.
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
Yeah dumb bitch posted a phone number on her twitter like she's 15!
She is so scared yet she twits it first then thinks about calling the police? BULLSHIT, its to divert attention from the picture of her being drunk off her ass at a club at 2 in the morning Sunday night!
Nice try though bitch, nice try!
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
what the hell is a freemason, or rather, what's the difference between that and a regular masson?
anyway, bo-ring...it's just your dealer looking for payment, dummy...he's not taking pussy anymore since he got burnt the last time and had to get on zythromax for 2 weeks. :P
She had enough time to tweet a photo of him, but didn't call the cops?! This dumb bitch deserves what's coming to her.
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Douchechill!
What a shitty stalker. Linds hasn't been exactly on the top of the world for the past 3 years with bodyguards etc and he couldn't catch her stumbling out of a club or shoplifting?
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twerk those stumps!