Jessica Chastain Is The Cream In A Greasy Orange Leather Sandwich
As Angie Jolie, Jude Law, Gavin Rossdale and Gwen Stefani watched, Jessica Chastain nearly suffered third-degree heat burns in her palms when she held hands with live burning men, Sean Penn and Brad Pitt, at the Tree of Life premiere at Cannes today. On a positive note, if Jessica's curls go limp, she could wrap her locks of hair around Sean Penn's finger and wait until that shit starts to smoke.
I mean, we all know that Sean Penn uses lighter fluid as moisturizer and has the complexion of teriyaki beef jerky, but Brad Pitt needs to run away from the bronzer bath. Fighting the hot with orange grease is an illegal act! I just want to throw him into a stainless steel bin marked "orange chicken" at Panda Express. Dude just needs a turtleneck and he'll be the front-runner for the lead role in a Robert Evans biopic.
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Submitted by Anti-Brandgelina on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 6:53am.
lol, Michael K, you NEED TO START A NEW POSTS with that mug-shot of wasted Angelina after party yesterday:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/05/17/article-1387898-0C1A3332000005...
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LMAO... Either wasted or just had sex in the back of a car... You can dress her up, you just cant take her out! She doesnt even look like a happy drunk. Freakin' joy kill.
Submitted by K2 on Tue, 05/17/2011 - 5:01am.
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Go and choke on your swatiska vibrator you racist whore.
lol, Michael K, you NEED TO START A NEW POSTS with that mug-shot of wasted Angelina after party yesterday:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/05/17/article-1387898-0C1A3332000005...
They are improving on the way they pad her. Nice dress, pretty face and emaciated body. Fitt looks cro magnon in that main picture. The King and Queen of Hollyweird. Boo Hiss.
Angie thinks she looks like hot shit just because she's wearing a big-girl dress. Despite the fact that there's way too much fabric, she doesn't look so emaciated when her legs are covered or her dress isn't transparent.
I think there's another "Love Angelina" on this thread.
It goes by the name Allessandra .
Bitch is on every Jolie thread but has the nerve to call other people obsessed for being on the same thread. Psycho!! (honey, up your meds).
Yup, this is gross.
And Pitt "fighting the hot.? Really? He always looks like he is pill popping to me in the past 4 years or so. Not hot.
I agree....I do not know what the relevance is of Stefani and her equally over accessorizing hubby.
Angelina really cannot dress for shit. Worst body too. Good face I will give her that but really that is all there is. Someone at work interviewed her in Cannes and said that whilst Dustin was about the greatest person ever, all charm and laughs Angelina had no sense of humour whatsoever. She didn't understand half of the jokes that were made. A co star of hers (I won't say who) commented on it to said colleague.
Submitted by K2 on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 9:01pm.
Submitted by Allessandra on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 8:29pm.
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Listen , you crazy nut fuck ... stop hounding me!! There's 3 pages of comments on this thread and you're going to zero in on mine. You are a fucking FREAK !!!!!!!!!!!!
No secret that I dont like Jolie ... I have an opinion just like you do ... now go shut your hole!!! Dumb twat.
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Shut my hole,lol is that meant to sound insulting??You go on my nervs because you ALWAYS comment on her.You are OBSESSED and you dont give a shit about logic and reason.She could look like a topmodel,save 10 babies from death and you would still diss her.
If its a topic about Angelina,the racist ho k2 is gonna come and comment!!and since you are a racist I find you even more irritating.Fuck you and your racist/crazy head
Submitted by kndall44 on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 11:58pm.
.
You KNOW these happy-Brad-pics are just another arrow in the heart of Jen... post demise of her dog.
How rude of Angie..
Not sure if you're serious, but if you are, *eyeroll*. Like Angie even knows.
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
.
You KNOW these happy-Brad-pics are just another arrow in the heart of Jen... post demise of her dog.
How rude of Angie..
.
Submitted by dlaugher on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 10:34pm.
why is brown not a fashion color? i love it.
ITA. Chocolate brown is a great color. Angie is working it.
NO brown and black together, though. Ick. Nast.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
why is brown not a fashion color? i love it.
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
for years, brad has fought with tooth, nail, and goat-beard against being a good-looking guy.. it looks like father time is, finally, granting his wish. mark my words though, he's gonna wish he had made more of his cutie-pie days.
Submitted by Allessandra on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 8:29pm.
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Listen , you crazy nut fuck ... stop hounding me!! There's 3 pages of comments on this thread and you're going to zero in on mine. You are a fucking FREAK !!!!!!!!!!!!
No secret that I dont like Jolie ... I have an opinion just like you do ... now go shut your hole!!! Dumb twat.
Submitted by sushi on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 7:38pm.
bmitted by Hotmami on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:48pm.
Submitted by sushi on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:42pm.
I would LOVE for Angie to gain some more weight, but she looks beautiful.
Still, tats in evening gowns in my opinion (sorr to tat lovers) are trashy
*blushes because I totally have tattoos that can be seen in evening gowns* :)
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Fuck, I'm sorry. I think on Hotmami, they would look beautiful.
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I think Angie's tats are just trashy looking. She should touch the fading ones up. Some tattoos, like Margaret Cho's, look awesome in formal wear.
I like the dress, I just can't stand the twatwaffle wearing it. She looks slightly less like a black widow spider in brown.
Brad Pitt and Sean Penn look like aging Vegas lounge lizards. Someone said that Brad is rocking the Cuban drug lord look...that's about right, too.
Submitted by K2 on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 5:52pm.
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Why do you crazy racist bitch comment on EVERY thread about this woman,why????You are LAME.Your obsession gets on my fucking nervs,and the fact that you dont even hold back sometimes,just to atleast hide your crazy...
Now to the topic,I like Angelina´s dress but hate the colour.I hate her insistance on dark colours.She looks really beautiful tho.But I do think she should gain something like 15 pounds.
Jessica Chastain looks like a penis head.
.
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Submitted by sushi on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 7:38pm.
Aww, thanks! I feel the same way sometimes, which is weird. No worries. Well, kinda. My brother is getting married in December and I'm kinda hoping that I'm not in the wedding party. :P
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Angie Ho's face looks pretty...sommmmeboddy got some woooorrrrkkk dooonnnneeee!!!!
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"Hooooooty who give an eff about Haiti?! I don't! BAM!" - MK as Taylor Momsen
bmitted by Hotmami on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:48pm.
Submitted by sushi on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:42pm.
I would LOVE for Angie to gain some more weight, but she looks beautiful.
Still, tats in evening gowns in my opinion (sorr to tat lovers) are trashy
*blushes because I totally have tattoos that can be seen in evening gowns* :)
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Fuck, I'm sorry. I think on Hotmami, they would look beautiful.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:54pm.
Who buys that L.A.M.B. crap?
I have a Harajuku Lovers hoodie and a pair of LAMB heels.
*shrugs*
Brad looks like a kiddie fiddler from 1920. I hope to God he's boning that ginger trick and it becomes a scandal.
bmitted by precociousmagpie on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:54pm.
Gwen Stefani bores the living daylights outta me. So does her gay husband. What do they even do all day anymore?? Who buys that L.A.M.B. crap?
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*raises hand*
I have bought a few things from her clothing and bag line that I love.
Gwen Stefani bores the living daylights outta me. So does her gay husband. What do they even do all day anymore?? Who buys that L.A.M.B. crap?
_________________________
Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
Submitted by sushi on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 6:42pm.
I would LOVE for Angie to gain some more weight, but she looks beautiful.
Still, tats in evening gowns in my opinion (sorr to tat lovers) are trashy
*blushes because I totally have tattoos that can be seen in evening gowns* :)
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
I would LOVE for Angie to gain some more weight, but she looks beautiful.
Still, tats in evening gowns in my opinion (sorr to tat lovers) are trashy.
Gwen looks good. I wish I has the self control to never get tan. Her skin is great. I look like bacon.
Oh, Angelina. How I would love to take a "moment" with her. It's a fantasy that has tormented me for years, ever since my pivotal first viewing of "Cyborg 2"; she is the cause of my sleeplessness on many a hot, steamy Miami night.
For Angie, I doll myself up in a breezy, slinky tunic and tightly pressed Dockers. The enchanting sound of my romantic sax pieces from "At Last: The Duets Album" permeates the room, caressing the both of us with intoxicating tones. I shudder, my body overwhelmed with desire. My fat lipped princess is slumped over a fainting couch, her curvy bones tightly hugged by a trashy leather evening dress. Slowly, sensually, I pull the syringe from Angie's sinewy arm and gently place it in her Chanel clutch, making sure that it was securely nestled beside the miniature safe which houses Brad's scrotum and testicles. The whites of her eyes flash wildly as her eyes roll about, her body listless. Angie's main forehead vein stands erect, pulsing and and leaving me with an ache in my loins. I begin to feverishly tongue her throbbing blood-filled lovetube, lapping it up as a kitten would milk. Without warning, Angie vomits on my neck, a foul, hot, tar-like substance tickles my prominent Adam's apple. It's time to take it to the next level. Angie likes pain, so the tenor sax is clearly the right instrument with which to plunge into her mottled, brother-fucked cave of desire...
AJ looks nice, for once. Her bony arms still freak me out, but she looks slightly healthier.
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Silly rabbit.
Love Angie's dress - not so much the colour. I would have liked it more in a red or maybe a raspberry but considering she normally wears only black the choc brown is an improvement.
Why does Brad and Gavin have the same Brylcreemed hair? Is this the latest trend? Hope not.
Are you sure this wasn't taken while she was walking down the Craftsman aisle at Sear's, as there would be tools on either side of her there, as well?
Why is she parading those skeleton legs in that dress? For the love of God, cover them up !! Angie - you lost your HOT in 2005 ..hate to break it to ya.
Jolie : What is going on with her grandma elbows and the pimples on her forehead?? With that being said ... she also needs to actually DO something with her hair. I think it's safe to say that the stragly, split ends look is OUT.
And why do they always seem to photograph them with him staring deeply into her lips (never her eyes)? It's very fake.
Where's Penn's flavor of the month?
I can't stand Angelina Jolie but she looks great. (Her face anyway, she still looks too skinny) I wonder if she had any more work done? She looks younger and fresher.
Brad Pitt looks like shit.
And I don't like his acting either.
As a matter of fact, I dislike all orange men.
There, I've said it and I won't take it back.
Submitted by Hotmami on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 5:06pm.
I'm loving Angie's dress. *runs*
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me too
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Submitted by chinlee3 on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 4:30pm.
That fella in the last photo stole the show.
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Damn, he is smokin!
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 5:06pm.
Dsmoke -- I hate bows, too. Not that my mom forced me to wear them, but I'm a very monastic dresser and don't like overly frilly things. I also dislike them because I used to be friends with this land whale who thought bows were the bomb. Since I've had the displeasure of knowing her, I hate bows even more.
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lol! I don't like frilly either.
In thumb #3 Angie's forehead looks broken out: Pregnant!
Dsmoke -- I hate bows, too. Not that my mom forced me to wear them, but I'm a very monastic dresser and don't like overly frilly things. I also dislike them because I used to be friends with this land whale who thought bows were the bomb. Since I've had the displeasure of knowing her, I hate bows even more.
I'm loving Angie's dress. *runs*
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Is Bradley trying to look like a thin Julian Schnabel?
Angie Jo's wrist bones tell me she is not a natural ectomorph. She's supposed to have more meat on her bones like she did before she got famous. So, she's either anorexic or a junkie because this is not natural for her. If it were, her wrist bones would be closer together...and with those wrists and those hands Angie Jo should NEVER wear bracelets...NEVAH!!!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by skabazzle on Mon, 05/16/2011 - 4:02pm.
Dsmoke, my mom used to slap a bow on my head every single day when I was little. I still have most of them, and I believe she made some of them. I wasn't really averse to it, though, I just went with it bahahaha.
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Ok, so it's just me, lol! The bigger they are, the creepier they are, too.
Holy Crap, Gwen Stefani looks effing sensational, man. She has never looked better, I must say.
How do people get to a point where they look in the mirror and go, yep, orange skin is totally normal?? I've never understood it.
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This signature will be publicly displayed at the end of my comments.
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That fella in the last photo stole the show.