QOTD: A Hangover Cure From Fishsticks Paltrow!
Because you get all your hangover cure tips from a pretentious praying(foryoutobeasperfectasheroneday) mantises who leave you reaching for a bottle of anything that's mind numbing, here's one from Fishsticks Paltrow! Fishy tells Closer Magazine (via UsWeekly) what she does after a night of boozing (like she really does that) so she doesn't feel like me after reading GOOP.
All you'll need is water (imported from a mountain range that's way better than the Alps), a private sauna and some envy tea!
"I have a great hangover cure. I take a cold shower in the morning and then I go into the sauna and drink a lot of water throughout the day. Green tea also helps!"
When Closer asked Fishy if it was okay to stick your face over a pot of water boiling on your hot plate if you don't have a sauna, she started blinking uncontrollably until an assistant had to come in and whisper in her ear that everything was going to be okay even if she was in the presence of a poor. If you don't have a private sauna, you shouldn't get drunk, thankyouvermuch!
And speaking from experience, the best thing for a hangover is to not read about Fishsticks Paltrow's hangover cures.
• 
Damn can this chick ever not say something totally pretentious??!! Please stop talking!
Diuretics (green tea and sweating excessively) are not a good idea when hungover due to DEHYDRATION. Drink a couple of glasses of water and then move on to fennel tea and saltines which quell nausea.
She's a desperate (to be noticed) loon.
.
I'm more interested in Chris Martin's response.
Oh yeah, he doesn't hangout w/Gwyn anymore.
.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
@agirl it'd like you can read my mind.
I think Fishy is trying to dial it down a bit, ya know, to be more "one with the masses."
Ain't no way she has some random "sauna."
I picture her having a Native American sweat lodge.
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GERONIMO!
*wants desperately to see pics of Jack-In-the-Hat and Sucky*
(separate or together, nudes preferred but I'll take what I can get)
@NDN Chief - Fishsticks was fantastic in Se7en! Especially at the end when her severed head was in that box? I LOVED IT! I could watch that part over and over.
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Praying Mantises are really amazing and I resent the comparison.
Is she for real ? Like she has suffered a hangover in years. Stop pretending like you can relate to the masses, with talk of saunas after your cold shower. Pretentious bitch.
MickeyHolland 11:42pm.
The guillotine is by far the most effective cure against a hangover. It has so many other benefits too, such as instantly ridding the world of a boring ass guru light.
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Word that
Okay, I kind of like her hair...
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
You know MK, i'm starting to think that you may have a non-sexual crush on Gwyneth...because as lame and boring as she is, she's almost always on this site! AH!!
"I make myself sick, Get on my own nerves. Immature, insecure,Grown up nerd."
-Fat lip (The Pharcyde)
Of course, not any old green tea will do. No...the green tea must be hand-harvested from the slopes of Annapurna by one-armed albino monkeys and then thrice blessed by Shiva. Leave that Twinings shit for the hoi polloi.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sun, 05/15/2011 - 12:56pm.
Will look into. Thanks. I do have a BBF (Best British Friend), so I'll ask that person.
Yeah, except for the obvious ("thrupenny bits"), I don't get rhyming slang. It's too clever by half.
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 10:40pm.
I don't speak "rhyming slang" (ugh), so many of VIZ's comics are impossible to decipher, and most are just moronic and lewd (exception: "Fat Slags" is moronic, lewd, and funny).
The one strip I do find hilariously funny is something called "The Modern Parents". It only appears once or twice a year, though, like a latterday Rabbitville Gazette.
"Roger's Profanisaurus" can be amusing as well.
They've also had some one-offs that are absolutely brilliant. Will have to ask the hub for titles. (He's the subscriber, as if you couldn't guess.)
_________________________
Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
only pussies get hangovers.
smart people know that when you get home, you have two fried eggs and buttered toast.
no hangover to nurse.
if you over the age of 24 and are too pukey to eat when you get home, you are stupid, and shouldnt be allowed out.
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The McCanns Did It
Submitted by Gem: "God, she's dense.
Here's the real cure: take a hot shower, drink some coffee, smoke a joint, go back to bed for the rest of the day...."
Exactly! Now what I'm interested in is how to stop those awful bed spins, stuff that precedes the hangover. My usual cure is to throw up and rest my head on the cold bathroom tiles (my BFFs).
One day poseurs like her will face the consequences when one of their moronic fans heed their advice and become seriously ill or die. And I really hope that someone gets sick (not dies, unlike its Jessica Seinfeld) and sues her ass. Even if they don't sue or win, I hope the fall out from it will shut that snotty twit up.
God, she's dense.
Here's the real cure: take a hot shower, drink some coffee, smoke a joint, go back to bed for the rest of the day....
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 7:59pm.
lolol!!! Okay, maybe not THAT boring. ;) Jacko is the coolest, so much fun, with a heart of gold, and surprisingly a gentleman! *ruins his dl rep*
Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Sun, 05/15/2011 - 10:42am.
based on this Youtube of her with Graham Norton.. I stand by my opinion that she is an "affected" waayyy over-priliveged American twatwaffle (and fuck the Oscar; that was a joke).
Poor Geoffrey Rush--to be subjected to that, as a truly deserving Oscar winner (and who got hosed this year).
Doesn't every NWA fan know the lyrics?
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth: "Hair of the dog.
And I like FIshy too. Always will.
*builds bunker*"
You better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6Oej7K469I
based on this Youtube of her with Graham Norton.. I stand by my opinion that she is an "affected" waayyy over-priliveged American twatwaffle (and fuck the Oscar; that was a joke).
Hip hop, indeed. Yes, Gwynnie, you truly are a woman of the people. insert massive double eye-roll here . I still don't like her, and think her public lambasting is well deserved.
The hell I'm getting in a sauna while hungover. Bitch please. I know doing some cardio to sweat it out works but sitting in an enclosed hot room? Ugh just shoot me, unnecesary torture.
Hair of the dog.
And I like FIshy too. Always will.
*builds bunker*
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
The words: bowel movement, going number 2 and taking a shit have now been replaced by "Gwyneth" in my house! It's easier to say & it makes me happy...example;"I'm taking a Gwyneth!" or "Flush that Gwyneth down the toilet!" Very satisfying!
i know were supposed to hate on fishsticks... but i saw her on graham norton the other night and she was pretty funny... aaaand likable DONT SHOOT ME >.>
*taking cold shower, jumping into wood-fired sauna, drinking lots of Pellegrino™ (it's Italian and more watery than regular water)*
*calling green tea-monger for takeaway*
"Best thing to eat is cooked rice/porridge. "
You just gave me a reason to eat more sushi.
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What's up, douchebag?
"You ask me how to cure your headache? Use a gun."
One of my favorite lyrics (from Sneaker Pimps) :D
The guillotine is by far the most effective cure against a hangover. It has so many other benefits too, such as instantly ridding the world of a boring ass guru light.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
.
Sounds about right.
Coming from a person that said, "British people are more civilized and intelligent than Americans."
You filthy naffs...
The hell Im getting into a hot ass sauna while hungover.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 10:26pm.
VIZ is best viewed in the flesh, where the assaultive content can be controlled to some extent
If you mean subscribe, the odds of that are about zero point zero zero. I just read a funny strip online called "Oor Frankie"(?), which sort of gave me the gist.
I deny being a faux Anglophile, too. I likes what I likes, is all. *having scones with clotted cream and saying "whilst" and "bugger" a lot*
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:55pm.
VIZ is best viewed in the flesh, where the assaultive content can be controlled to some extent, and is guaranteed not to be funny at all for several years. At least that was my experience.
And it helps to be a faux-Anglophile. ;^)
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Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
Uh, she is way WRONG!!!! I study & teach TCM and green tea is one of the worst things you can take for a hangover. Water is okay.
What a doufus giving out false med advice.
Best thing to eat is cooked rice/porridge. Add a bit of fennel if you got the chills! If you overdid it with beer and have the runs, rye bread is good.
Even though you may want to, avoid drinking milk...it really just makes everything worse.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Fishsticks aka Anybody that can read an AMA recipe for a hangover. This bitch. I am really tryin to think of a movie (besides) Seven (&she didn't carry the movie) that she deserves sooooo much whatever.
Take one aspirin before bed with a big glass of water. The aspirin is preventive and the water counteracts the dehydration. A sauna will dehydrate more.
dumb bitch.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:48pm.
NO! YOU MUSTN'T!
*gulp*
Too late. You mean the comic, right? I see bright colors and exclamation points, but I'm not in the mood to do anything more demanding now than bend an elbow.
My glance at it reminded me of the HolyMoly site before it got all impressed with itself.
Submitted by Bjork You on Sat, 05/14/2011 -
And is Sucky cute? Or does he look like the Mr. Alphonso from "Alice, Sweet Alice"?
Bjorkie, no, Sucky doesn't look like that ogre! LOLOL! He is actually very slender and handsome.
my cure is a couple advil with a few sips of coke before bed...wake up fresh as a spring daisy.
she's right, in the sense that sweating the alcohol out is a good way to get over it. exercise in lieu of a sauna, that is, if you didn't get really blitzed the night before...the next day, all you want to do is not throw up. in which case, have some advil with coke.
OK, I've had some hangovers where I thought I was gonna die, so here is my advice, for what it's worth, from a former bartender and veteran drunken slut. Maybe it will help someone out there.
Party time: Potato vodka with no fruit juice or mixers, besides some kind of seltzer/tonic water. If you stick to this, you can drink more and feel less crappy. And drink one glass of water to every drink (I know, duh.)
If you screw up and drink more than you should have, or mixed a few different alcohols, take a couple of charcoal tablets before bed. You can buy these at health food/vitamin stores. It absorbs the alcohol. If you don't have, eat burnt toast.
Before bed, and the next morning, Pedialyte. Works better than Gatorade. I drink generic Pedialyte from Walgreen's. Is amazing. Also, hair of the dog, something light, like a white wine or more vodka if you really went balls to the wall. Again, duh, but couldn't leave it out.
I will try Goopy's advice on the sauna. I have a cheap, infrared sauna that's portable that I sit in, and I swear by to keep me from getting colds/flus. I bought mine for $150. It kills viruses, like a fever does, really works. I haven't used it for hangovers, due to concerns about dehydration, so if something goes wrong, I'll have one more thing to blame Fishsticks for. I will also have to try the Sunny D/Alka Seltzer thing. Cheers :)
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:37pm.
NO! YOU MUSTN'T!
*gulp*
_________________________
Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:27pm.
Yet another quasi-Anglophile who DOES NOT KNOW ABOUT VIZ.
*begins to wonder--really wonder--about so many, many things*
hahahaha. Very funny. I'm no sort of Anglophile: my ancestors were cruelly hunted down by their British overlords. I just read the sleazy stories in the Mail. *off to Google "VIZ"* *Eeyore face*
Dude, the best hangover cure is a stiff Bloody Mary.
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:20pm.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:17pm.
Sorry, feeling dense: What is VIZ?
Yeah, that Mail article was revolting but the writer nicely skewered her. Who'd you rather hang out with : The Goopster or the writer?
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I have to go with the writer on this one, unbelievable as that is.
Yet another quasi-Anglophile who DOES NOT KNOW ABOUT VIZ.
*begins to wonder--really wonder--about so many, many things*
_________________________
Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:17pm.
Sorry, feeling dense: What is VIZ?
Yeah, that Mail article was revolting but the writer nicely skewered her. Who'd you rather hang out with : The Goopster or the writer?
Submitted by Bjork You on Sat, 05/14/2011 - And is Sucky cute? Or does he look like the Mr. Alphonso from "Alice, Sweet Alice"? (Love that guy):
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Bjork, you've earned a special place in my pantheon of Dlisters for even remembering Mr. Alphonse!! A great performance forgotten by almost everyone...thanks for the shout out to him!!
"Seymour!! You said you'd never get married until you bought me an iron lung!"
Submitted by mharker on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 9:05pm.
It's better than Alicia Silverstone's advice from her cookbook, which is to eat a Japanese plum called umbeoshi (something like that). Right, I'm just going to go the grocery store and pick that up!
Umeboshi are actually good, but sort of salty/bitter. They're a common health-food supplement and treat among Japanese--maybe like pickles or cherries. I bet Silverstone lives near the Japanese markets in West LA so she can get them easily. They supposably cure hangovers, too.
Submitted by RustyHooligan on Sat, 05/14/2011 - 8:32pm.
Oh dear lord.
Speaking of the Mail, I wonder why VIZ doesn't skewer Goopy?
_________________________
Covered it with what?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw