Feel Free To Talk Shit About Matthew Perry While He’s In Rehab

May 12, 2011 / Posted by:

And as you're talking mess, Matthew Perry will be side-eyeing you from his rehab suite.

Matthew is making it so that the patients and technicians at the rehab clinic he's about to check into can't sell a story off to the tabloids for a check made out to cash. Matthew is beating them to the virgin punch. (Yes, I know the "punch" in "beat you to the punch" isn't that kind of punch, but doesn't it sound more delicious if you think of it that way?)

Matthew is letting the media know that he's going away for a while to work on his sobriety for the third time. Matthew doesn't say if he belly flopped off the wagon or if the wagon knocked him off, he's just saying that he's checking out for a minute so don't look for him.

"I'm making plans to go away for a month to focus on my sobriety and to continue my life in recovery. Please enjoy making fun of me on the World Wide Web.”

It's no fun to mock a ho when they invite you to do so. Way to deflate a cunt, Matthew.

via E! Online

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