Hot Slut Of The Day!

Ben Sheward, the cartwheeling verger who was so happy about the Royal Wedding (or happy that it was FINALLY done with) that he let his emotions flip him over so that his crotch smiled at the sky!

Now, you know that when I said my Royal Wedding coverage was done, I was lying. The Royal Wedding is like that one-night trick you can’t get to leave. After you’ve had your fun and you throw out a not-so-subtle hint by saying, “Aaaaaah, I’m so busy today. I have to flea dip my crotch and crochet a dozen yarn muffins for obese orphans, etc…“, they still won’t leave! You take a shower, come out and find that they’ve made you breakfast. You like breakfast, so you eat it. Then you go into your bathroom and say you have to pluck each one of your pubic hairs out on by one (which could take HOURS, if not days) and you come back out to find that they’ve color-coded all of your books. You like looking at a book shelf full of color-coded books, so you say thank you, but then you tell them that you’ve just been told that you have exactly 2 hours to live because your last kidney is about to give out. Your one-night trick then tells you that not only does he have an extra kidney he can give you, but he’s also a surgeon who specializes in doing bath tub surgeries on the fly. He just won’t leave.

The Royal Wedding is like that. You want them to leave, but then they give you gems like this video of the Cartwheeling Verger!

via Buzzfeed & Contact Music