Ashton & Demi Are Wasting Trees!

April 15, 2011 / Posted by:

Demi Moore and her overgrown man child of a husband Ashton Kutcher are currently making the media rounds to raise awareness of child sex slave trafficking (and mostly raise awareness of themselves) and last night they talked to CNN’s Piers Morgan (via USA Today) about their crusade and THEMSELVES! All that discussion about children getting kidnapped and sold to pedophiles just really got Piers thinking about Ashton and Demi’s married life so he asked them about it. They said that one of the ways they keep the romance (ugh) alive is by leaving little notes for each other around the house. You know, notes that say: “Ashton, please aim for the bullseye decal at the bottom of the toilet like we learned in potty training class. Love, Demi”. Sweet shit like that.

Kutchie explained to Piers, “If you go to our house I have Post-it notes that are placed in various locations, all with messages of encouragement or love, or just thought. Post-it notes are much cheaper than diamond rings.” Demi’s pie hole then piped in with, “And some have been there, I don’t know, seven years? My most recent one was just a reminder that I was magical.”

Think of the trees who were viciously slaughtered just so they could be processed into paper that Ashton uses to write crap like “you are magical” to Demi. Sad. The souls of the trees double bawl when Ashton tells Demi that the strange dried fluids on the Post-it note she left on the table next to the sofa in his office is just tuna salad splatters.

Demi & Ashton should at least recycle those notes by donating them to hospitals who can use them to help patients vomit.

Here’s MooreKutch with Scout Willis at the launch party for their “Real Men Don’t Buy Girls” charity.

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