Open Post: Hosted By A Fireman And A Kitten
I didn't know it was possible for me to grow ovaries just so that they can combust, but that's exactly what happened on the inside of me after this picture of a fireman giving oxygen to a kitten landed in my inbox a dozen times. Those big man hands! That tiny kitten face! That little paw poking out! I can't even make an inappropriate joke about this (I can, but I'll save it for the next time a firefighter gives oxygen to a kitten). My heart just melted and slid out of one of my nipples.
This picture is filled with so many awwwws that it could make even the blackest heart in the evilest underworld demon (I'm looking at you, Kunty Karl Lagerfeld) start beating again. It truly is the cure for the common cunt.
Source: TOM BAUER/Missoulian via Cute Overload (Thanks to everybody who sent this in)
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Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:22pm.
UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH. FML.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Fuck y'all in the balls who have nice weather. We just lost the last of the snow yesterday.
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The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
81 right now.
BLAH BLAH BLAH. this is how i feel today. i am boring. life is boring.
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Janey you know it's supposed to be back in the 50's again mañana, right?
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
Submitted by Green Tea Latte on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:14pm.
That is the WORST. I would rather it just stay 55 and then when it's ready to be 70 and stay 70 then it changes.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
*Wants to see pics of Jack and Sweetas night on the town!*
Seems we have no Spring or Fall round these parts either the temperature only changes in 30 degree increments!
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
DWM:
Hahahahahaha! I literally laughed and choked at that comment!
*masterbates furiously to pictures*
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
It's 82 here today...
"not so fast tom ryan..."
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:13pm.
SHOTGUN!!
What? I get carsick.
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You are SO selfish!
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Well you sure as shit aren't driving! you only have one eye!!
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
guest - yep. I sent her pics! lol
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Jack & Sweetas...does Snowy know about this??????
"not so fast tom ryan..."
@MJT
It was 85 and sunny yesterday, headed to the beach and brought out the coochie cutters :D
55 and nippy today :( Going down to the 30's tonight Damn if I'm going to turn on the heater!
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
Team Chicken in the backyard. I live 20 feet from the cityline, which means by citylaws and cant have livestock. So i walk the 20 feet to the farm up the street, get my 12 eggs from happy chickens for $ 2.00 and let homegirl deal with the chickenshit.
Anyone else sweating their asses off today??
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fuck those goddamn son of a horses i got better things to do like love landwhale and bake some bread and tell some fuckers to fuck off.----charlie m.
Pregnant in Heels? Anybody? Anybody?
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:04pm.
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:00pm.
Guess a bunch of us can carpool to the glue factory together!
SHOTGUN!!
What? I get carsick.
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You are SO selfish!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:07pm.
Lil G may be 16 on Wed but the goofball hasn't even got a permit yet!!! SHE CAN'T PASS THE EXAM!!
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Pot melts the brain like a plastic spoon in the microwave.
*electric slides in for a hot second*
Hi Hoarrrz! The fark is going on in here?? Outta the loop (whatever the fk that dumb cliche means). Missed you hookers/pimps this weekend.
Anybody else get hives and shit when stressed, and if so, how the shit do you calm it down (outside of the typical benadryl/voddy mix). Desperate for relief from this damn new over-reactive skin shit. Jebus, like I need another fking ailment.
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"How about never? Is never good for you?"
It's almost 90 here. We don't get Spring in these parts... Straight from Winter right into Summer.
Except at night. I think this is the only place where heat is on at night and air during the day. ______________________________________________
"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Sweetass - please thank your lucky stars people were around... PUBLIC PLACES AND ALL!!!!
Yea, I was lucky enough to hang with Miss Sweetas Saturday night... I had great time!!!!! But we always have fun together!
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Submitted by ba-buttons on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:02pm.
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They peck each others assholes?? I did not know that. HAHAHA, so RUDE!
popping in...just in time to see this treasure:
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:55pm.
Submitted by bitchette on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:36pm.
age is no excuse, she should be able to move better than that
To be fair, once people reach the age of 30 they should just be sent off to the slaughterhouse....
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alright LS, I challenge you to the ultimate test:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InIxKCa3H9g
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:00pm.
Guess a bunch of us can carpool to the glue factory together!
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We're going to need a very big party bus !
╚══════════════ ೋღ☃ღೋ ═══════════════╝
Yeah, Fuck it.
Lil G may be 16 on Wed but the goofball hasn't even got a permit yet!!! SHE CAN'T PASS THE EXAM!!
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Submitted by Green Tea Latte on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:04pm.
Ugh spring has been the biggest cock tease to us NYCers since February. I have put away my winter coat and snow boots twice only to have to drag them back out. It's 70 today....and it better stay that way *sideeye*
eta: Added the word SPRING. Pretty important word there.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
I was due at the glue factory 6 years ago. Hope I don't spoil their batch of glue.
LOL....
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Constantly choosing the lesser of two evils is still choosing evil.
Jacko sorry I freaked out man, but you DON'T. TOUCH. MAH. JACKET. lolol No really, it was great to see ya! HEY ERRBODY BE JELLIZ I HANGED WIF JACK THIS WEEKEND. Neener neener neeeeener!
M.E. Chickens for real??? Ahahaha! I didn't even know you could FIND live chickens around there! smh
And ANYONE can be hot on AudioTune!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:00pm.
Guess a bunch of us can carpool to the glue factory together!
SHOTGUN!!
What? I get carsick.
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
That albino fireman will be getting ass for the rest of his life thanks to that kitten!
Don't forget about meee. But I'd rather go out for mexican food with 'ritas & 'ronas.
"not so fast tom ryan..."
OH ARE WE TALKING BRITNEY IN THESE LOWER CHATS?! :-P
DAMN YOU! Summer for sticking the tip in yesterday only to give us a SLAP in the face today.
signed,
All Chicagoans
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
If anything Nicki Minaj should be co-headlining, not opening for this swampbiscuit
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©
Chicken's are violent, wouldn't make good pets. No, seriously.
It's where we get the expression "pecking order". Chickens have a rigid hierarchy - if one eats when and where it isn't supposed to - all of the chickens, higher ranks and lower ranks, centre the rogue out and take turns pecking at it's asshole.
I know, crazy right? The worst part is that they peck and peck until they start pulling the rogue chickens guts out of it's asshole, usually killing it.
I saw it when I was over in Afghanistan, I thought the chickens had worms or something until one of the farm boys I served with enlightened me.
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It is better to die on your feet than live on your knees.
LOL missJANEY!! ♥
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Guess a bunch of us can carpool to the glue factory together!
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:57pm.
Can you swing by and pick me up? THANKS. Better yet, can you just ask Lil G to come by and get me? If I'm gonna die anyways....;)
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:54pm.
To be fair once people reach the age of 30 they should just be sent off to the slaughterhouse. I hear the world supply of glue is fast running out thanks to all those glue-sniffing street kids in Angola.
I'm sorry you must have us confused with horses. No dear, we are WHORES.
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
*hails cab, goes to glue factory*
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Submitted by fishsticksfan on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:50pm.
Might be my church girl side, but I feel uncomfortable with the image riri getting off on the smell of sex in the air.
Personally I find it disgusting.. febreeze your dirty dick smell out of the air before inviting me to your house.
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Submitted by bitchette on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:36pm.
age is no excuse, she should be able to move better than that
To be fair, once people reach the age of 30 they should just be sent off to the slaughterhouse. I hear the world supply of glue is fast running out thanks to all those glue-sniffing street kids in Angola.
I have seen Britney in concert many times (okay, every time she has toured). She used to be SO SO good in concert (dancing wise anyways - cause that's all I care about). I hope she gets it together...and I hope Nicki signs on for sure. DEAD.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Submitted by One-trick Pony on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:29pm.
Guys! I've been waiting for OP to share this link - Britney: Then and Now:
http://www.businessinsider.com/britney-spears-femme-fatale-nicki-minaj-d...
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Awwww, poor Britney. Seeing stuff like that actually makes me feel some sympathy for the girl.
I freely admit, I still like that Toxic song she did.
I feel bad for Brit, too. The video really underscores how sluggish she has become. She HAS to know her one great talent has all but evaporated. She can't even walk down stairs. And her body - while not fat by real-life standards - just looks so chunky and clumsy now.
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 1:45pm.
Poor Lithium induced brit brit
Brit brit and riri
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYraZQ8rxno&feature=player_embedded#at=46
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Might be my church girl side, but I feel uncomfortable with the image riri getting off on the smell of sex in the air.
Poor Lithium induced brit brit
Brit brit and riri
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYraZQ8rxno&feature=player_embedded#at=46
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
GAME SET AND MATCH TO IRISH!!!!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
That shit about chickens being pets was on the Today show. I have a friend that's had chickens as pets since we were little. She still has them as pets. No thank you.
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
I'm waiting for a cop from Campus Security to take a report. Thanks for all your help - Dlisters! You never let me down!