Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

March 22, 2011 / Posted by:

The last one worked out well for him, but he’s ready for a new beard. He’s been meeting with potential candidates for several weeks now. In case you’d like the job, here are his criteria:

* Female, pretty, age 25-40ish
* Actress (No musicians or models)
* Established in your own career (But don’t outshine him)
* Feminine but athletic (He would like to have a workout buddy)
* Primary residence in or around Los Angeles (Bonus points if you also have a New York pad)
* Previous experience as a beard preferred
* Available to start within the next three months (Blind Gossip)

I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that actual ad on Craigslist before. I’m going to go look for it now and then submit the head shot and resume of Jessica “Gillette’s Worst Enemy” Biel, because this is so hers. And yeah, I’m writing Bradley Cooper’s name on a piece of paper and throwing it in the guess hat.

Television execs are quietly putting out feelers to replace this talk show host. It’s not just that the ratings aren’t great. It’s that the producers are having trouble booking guests. Turns out that desirable potential guests either don’t like or don’t respect the host. The bigger surprise may be the host’s replacement. Execs are in talks tonight with someone that a network TV show is also looking to replace. And, no, the two won’t be swapping jobs. (Blind Gossip)

Elisabeth Hasselcrack and Jeannie Bice from Quacker Factory as her replacement? Now when I take off my “wishful fucking thinking” hat (it looks like this), my brain tells me to guess Piers Morgan and Katie Couric as his replacement?

Old Hollywood. This Golden Globe winning actress was A+++ list. She was primarily known for television and comedy and for a very distinctive voice. Prior to hitting it big though, our actress made ends meet not in the odd jobs she always claimed in her authorized biographies, but turning tricks. Supposedly it is also how she met her future husband (CDAN)

The rumor is that Lucille Ball engaged in high-priced ho shit before I Love Loosely, but I’m going to go with Carol Channing. Because Carol Channing as a hooker is everything!

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