No, this picture was not taken at the Scientology gift shop. It was taken a little after midnight today at Serendipity 3 in NYC. Stepford Katie’s internal screensaver (Tommy Girl slow dipping an L. Ron Hubbard hologram on a loop) must’ve kicked in before this picture was taken, because she has no idea that little Suri is holding a box of PENIS GUMMIES. And Katie’s head stayed in a state of hazy cluelessness for the rest of the night, because a rep for Serendipity tells the Daily Mail that one of Suri’s slaves paid for the box of fruity flaccid peens before they left.
You know, I’m still waiting for the moment when Yoko Ono takes off her Suri Cruise suit and reveals that this has all been part of an elaborate performance art piece. The high-heels. The pacifier addiction. The Penis Gummies. Even Noah Cyrus is saying, “….too much…too much.”
And yes, Serendipity (more like Serendickity) sells dick candies. Save me a place in line.