Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

March 14, 2011 / Posted by:

These two female celebrities are approximately the same age. Both have starred in multiple films, have been married more than once, and have more than one child. They also share the same religion and some significant business contacts.

You would think that with so much in common, they must get along, right? The truth is that these two absolutely can’t stand each other. They both have big egos and are desperate for attention. At a big post-Oscar party, they were each very careful to stay on their half of the room, each holding court with their fans and refusing to even look at each other. The tension was so thick you could have cut it with a knife (though hopefully not the same one wielded by their respective plastic surgeons). (Blind Gossip)

As much as I’d like to believe that Kelly Preston and Kirstie Alley wrestle in the sauna of the Scientology Center while John Travolta cheers on his wife with pom poms made from shredded audit results, all signs point to Madge and Demi Moore. Both are red string wearers. Both have memorized lines and said them in front of a camera. And both have newly constructed faces made from womb skin.

Why can’t they drop the shade and let the baby ass cheeks on their faces bond with each other during a playdate?

She’s long had a reputation for being absolute hell to work with. I mean like straight up crazy. Leaves her shit, sometimes literally, everywhere, specifies exact times when people can or cannot talk to her, is foaming at the mouth insane one minute, calm and collected the next. Lately her opportunities have dried up. And this is a good example of why.

Press junket. A handler has to make sure she wakes up in the morning. Because she’s not a proper adult? She finds her completely out of it. Has to put her in the shower and HOLD HER UP. Picture that please. A grown woman having to be physically SUPPORTED in the shower to make sure she can go and do her JOB. She then had to be spoon fed her breakfast. And she had to be dressed. Like, let’s put on your socks! Finally they get her to the point where she can be seen in public. A journalist is soon expected for an interview. Through it all she’s still a fucking zombie.

Soon as the reporter comes into the room though, a switch goes off. She’s alive. She’s engaging. She can speak in proper sentences. And you can imagine, for the people who’ve experienced this, who’ve had to work with her, who have to manage the unpredictability of this, how scary it must be, how utterly unsettling, even more unsettling than most of her peers. And in her business, that’s a pretty high standard. (Lainey Gossip)

I wish I had someone to hold me up in the shower, because standing up is hard! I usually find myself sitting on the bottom of the bath tub and cleaning out my in-between toe places before I get enough energy to stand back up again. I’m the body that lazy built. On that note, I’ll go with new favorite Xtina? Or Sally Kirkland.

Multiple sources are confirming that a wildly popular character on an hour drama that has long been an Aushole staple is about to take his/her last breath.

I’m told the producers of this unnamed broadcast series are planning to kill off the fan favorite either in the season finale or soon after the show returns next season.

It’s not clear if the decision was made for creative or budgetary reasons — it was likely a combination of both — but it’s my understanding that it was not arrived at lightly. Far from it, in fact.

There’s also a chance the execs at the program in question will have a last-minute change of heart, but, according my spies, it’s an extremely slim one. (TV Line)

Please let it be Star Jones on Celebrity Apprentice. But it’s probably that show I don’t watch on that network my Tivo never touches.

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