It’s times like this that I really wish there was a camera on the officer taking the mug shot, because you know they nearly hyperventilated from trying to swallow the laughs pouring out of their mouth. How can you not laugh at this fool who looks like a hairy Pac-Man crashed into the side of his head. 21-year-old David Davis of New Haven, CT is a fool for so many reasons. Motherfucker is a fool, because who messes with a glorious afro? Why would you try to cut something that can tickle your fuck partner’s nipples while you lick on their wet parts? WHY?
David is also a fool, because he stabbed a dude with scissors before his haircut ended. If you suddenly feel the need to stab someone while you’re sitting in the cuttin’ chair, you should at least wait until the barber (or whoever) is finished and you’ve looked into a hand mirror to make sure the back looks good. You tell your victim to wait a minute while you brush the itchy hairs off your neck. But this stupid piece of shit committed a crime while looking like a busted ass Victor/Victoria.
AND THEN David ran from the scene. A police dog later found David hiding in a nearby apartment. How did the dog find him, you ask? Well, the officer told the dog to look for the asshole with the discount fro on his head. It wasn’t hard.
Thankfully, the victim is going to be fine.
But seriously, we can all laugh at the repossessed fro on that bitch’s head, but it won’t be long before Kanye West starts wearing this look. Or Lady Gaga. You decide.