In the new issue of Out Magazine, Noah Michelson asks Brit Brit Spears who thinks she was in a past life and she answered with: Audrey Hepburn. Never mind that Audrey got her angel wings in 1993 and Brit was born from a Frito-Lay mixing machine in 1981, she’s absolutely right. Audrey and Brit are both the epitome of graceful elegance. Both inspire couturiers to design full fashion collections based on their timeless beauty. Both can finish a bowl of mashed corn fitters with no hands. And both are known for making jokes about how they think their butt just wet autographed their panties with a fart (they didn’t nickname Audrey “My Fart Lady” for nothing). Audrey Hepburn = Britney Spears. Exactly the same!
Here’s a few pieces from the interview (get the whole thing here):
When you were starting out, whose career did you want to mold yours after?
Madonna. No question. She is an amazing entertainer. Besides Madonna, I also admire Sarah Jessica Parker’s career and her shoe collection.
Are there any of your songs that you wish you hadn’t recorded/you don’t really love?
No. All of my songs are f–ing amazing.
How is Femme Fatale different from your other albums?
I think Femme Fatale is my most upbeat and mature album yet.
Assuming reincarnation exists, in a previous life I think I was…
Audrey Hepburn, because she was a trend setter.
Assuming reincarnation exists, in my next life I’d life to be…
A bird, so I can fly.
My idea of hell is…
Being on a diet.
My idea of heaven is…
A trip with my kids.
What is the best advice you’ve gotten and who was it from?
My mom said when you have a bad day, eat ice cream. That’s the best advice.
What is the worst advice a record executive ever told you?
Someone once told me that the “…Baby One More Time” video should be me as a superhero fighting a giant robot monster.
What women (living or dead) could make you think twice about your sexuality?
I only have eyes for men.
Who is your favorite Golden Girl?
Betty White, because she’s so sweet and innocent.
How do you feel about plastic surgery?
When it’s time to pull and tuck, I’m sure I will consider it.
I first learned about sex…
When I was 12 years old. From my mom. I was confused and disgusted.
Kissing Madonna was…
You’ve been married twice — once for only 55 hours. How do you feel about gay marriage?
I think everyone should be treated equally.
Lady Gaga is…
Christina Aguilera is…
The Brit Brit of a couple of years ago would’ve answered every question by saying “Huh?! VENTI!”, so she’s come along way. Actually, I think she did answer every question like that, but Noah is fluent in Cheetonese so he figured it out.
And here’s a few pictures of BS that were built by Photoshop.