Hot Slut Of The Day!
Maria Rodrigues de Aguiar Farias, a Brazilian housewife in São José de Ribamar who is charging people $2 to see the succulent peen fruit that grows in her backyard. If you want to take a picture, you’ll have to hand over $15. And a video costs $20! Make that money, you peen fruit pimp!
Maria is just like the modern day Jack of Jack and the Beanstalk. But instead of being a little ass boy, she’s a 53-year-old woman. And instead of the magic beans growing a beanstalk, the passion fruit seeds that were given to Maria by a friend grow gigantic circumcised dick fruits! Maria and the Peenstalk!
When word got out that Maria has a dick-growing tree, hos from all over begged her to let them get an eye full. Maria is not one to deny the peen fruit to anyone so she allowed skanks, tramps and their admirers to walk through her house and into her backyard. Maria didn’t charge anything at first, but when one dumb shit ruined everyone’s buzz by stealing her phone, she started charging. And horny hos still can’t get enough of Maria’s fruit!
Believe it or not, the inside of the peen fruit does not taste like what you’d think it tastes like. Maria says it tastes like a sweet avocado.
Researchers from the Brazilian Agricultural Research Corporation aren’t sure why the Green Giant’s cock is growing from a passion fruit vine but they did tell Globo.com, ” The passion fruit arises in the oval and then develops with that format. It is the first time that we learned of a product with these characteristics here in Maranhao. It’s pretty big, it’s pretty thick. It is even to have between 15 and 20 cm in length. There is no reason why the passion is not consumed because of the format.”
Who ever said that “miracles really do happen” was only saying that in anticipation of the day when dick grows on vines! FINALLY! That day has come. Cancel your Grindr account, remove Craigslist “Casual Encounters” from your bookmarks and tell the free clinic to burn your file for good, because all you need is this extra hung peen fruit! Throw a fruit roll-up condom over it, and get ready to go! And for those of you who get hungry after a good time, you can have some passion fruit and pussy (or ass) juice mash afterward. It’s a two in one!
And Maria better protect her vine with barbed wire unless she doesn’t mind walking back there one morning and finding John Travolta’s Scientolohole wrapped around one peen fruit while he sucks on another.
(Thanks to Adriano and Ana for this!)