Open Post: Hosted By Ursulatifah

March 3, 2011 / Posted by:

Disney has rolled out their latest batch of “Dream Portraits” shot by Annie Leibovitz and they pretty much broke the Photoshop machine several times on these. They all look like oil paintings a community college art student might sell in the last booth at the swap meet. But on a positive note, the casting isn’t totally making my head slump down like the time a boyfriend and me got stuck on the Haunted Mansion ride at Disneyland.

Yes, I’d rather see Wynonna Judd or Sonia from Operacion Repo as Divine (aka Ursula), but Queen Latifah is a good third choice. Alec Baldwin as the magic mirror works and Olivia Wilde throws an adequate stone cold Megan Fox face, but Sharon Stone or any one of the queens on Drag Race would’ve really scared the core out of an apple with their cunt glares.

But the only one I don’t understand at all is Jeff Bridges as The Beast and Penelope Cruz as Belle. I mean, HUH? Were Khloe Kardashian and the most beautiful Disney princess ever, Zac Efron, not available?!

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