Rosie O’Donnell Is Single Again

If you’re a gayelle who feels a special kind of tingle when your fuck partner growls like a pit bull gnawing on a bone while going down on you and love it when she shoots pussy balls at your parts using the slingshot from her old talk show, then pinch your nips because it’s your lucky day! Page Six reports that Rosie O’Donnell and her girlfriend Tracy Kachtick- Anders have stomped their relationship into a fine powder and fed it to the dandruff mutant monsters that live in Donald Trump’s hair. Basically, they broke up.

Tracy, who runs a nonprofit that recruits foster and adoptive homes within the LGBT community, moved her six kids to Florida to be with Rosie’s army of four children. A source didn’t give a reason as to why the love died like my nerves whenever Elisabeth Hasselcrack talks for more than 3 seconds on The View. But the source did say that Tracy has stayed in Florida and moved to a nearby house, because her kids and Rosie’s kids have become close. Rosie’s rep didn’t address the split but let it be known that Tracy and Rosie were never officially the Lezzie Bunch:

“Rosie and Tracy never officially lived under one roof. They have lived near one another for quite some time, and their families still socialize and they see each other frequently.”

I’m not going to comment that Rosie is probably difficult as fuck to live with because she nibbles on your ear lobe one minute and then barks into your ear hole the next when you breathe the wrong way or something. Instead I’m going to blame this split on the most obvious thing….CROCS! CROCS may feel like a warm smile for your feet to some people, but it’s made of the labia from Satan’s minions and it devours love whenever it gets a chance! And Rosie’s relationship ending is a prime example of that shit. And don’t get me started on CROCS dildos. Not today.