Ashlee Simpson Quits Pete Wentz

February 9, 2011 / Posted by:

This picture of Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz bonding over their mutual love of awful fucking hair was taken just last month and now they’re completely over after 2 years of marriage! The meaning of love gave an encore of Ashlee’s SNL performance and CHOKED. Just dance a jig, love, and keep on going.

TMZ reports that Ashlee just filed for divorce in L.A. today and is asking for primary physical custody and joint legal custody of their 2-year-old son Bronx. Papa Joe did good, because Ashlee didn’t sign a prenup. She’s asking for both spousal and child support.

You know, I’m not even surprised anymore when I find out who DIVORCE decided to curse this time. Bitches are either birthing a divorce or filing a baby. One of those. The thing that’s got me furrowing my brow like Papa Joe when Jessica Simpson wears a turtleneck is that the year is 2011 and we’re still talking about Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz!

My guess is that Ashlee took one look at Pete’s new au naturale “Lionel Richie clay head” fro and let jealousy get the best her. Ashlee refuses to live in the shadow of that beautiful piece of frizzy art.

And this gives Jessica an excuse to tear up the Entenmann’s aisle again. Jessica’s eating Ashlee’s feelings for her. That’s what sisters are for!

UPDATE: TMZ’s sources say that Ashlee made the decision to melt the straightening balm that bonded their love together, because she was sick of Pete’s “erratic” behavior. Erratic = that hair. Ashlee’s been trying to stay out of show business shit and focus on raising their son, but Pete wants to keep making “music” and touring.

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