Some of Hollywood is still rubbing burn cream on their ass lips from when Ricky Gervais put a BIC under their butts at the Golden Globes last weekend. And they’re still mad about it. Judd Apatow, director of Knocked Up and The 40 Year Old Virgin, hosted the Producers Guild Awards last night and he used his opening monologue to kick at Ricky’s nalgas for being a meanie bully. Judd tried to give Ricky a taste of his own cunt syrup. From The Hollywood Reporter:
Judd on Ricky hosting the GGs: “What did you think of Ricky Gervais? I didn’t like him. I thought he was mean.”
Judd on Ricky’s Lost joke: “He had that joke about the guy on Lost. He said he ate everybody else. Let’s be honest — Ricky Gervais just lost weight. Even now he’s four pounds away from not being allowed to do a joke like that. Did he lose weight just to make fat jokes? You think that’s how mean he is?”
Judd on Ricky’s Tim Allen joke: “He made a joke about Tim Allen who was standing next to Tom Hanks. Who looks good standing next to Tom Hanks? We all look like a piece of shit standing next to Tom Hanks! Warren Buffet would look like a piece of shit next to Tom Hanks.Tim Allen did 200 episodes of Home Improvement. He was in three of the highest grossing movies of all time. And his latest just crossed the one billion mark. Whereas The Invention Of Lying made $18 million dollars worldwide…Leave Tim Allen alone.”
Judd on Ricky’s The Tourist joke: “Ricky says the characters were two-dimensional. Then he says he hasn’t seen The Tourist. So as a comedian, that’s not fair, is it? To make jokes about a movie you haven’t seen. I can’t do a joke about The Invention of Lying because I haven’t seen it. You haven’t seen it. None of us have seen it. So the joke would not work.”
Everybody should feel better now that Judd has gently kissed their burnt anuses. This was basically Judd’s #itgetsbetter message to poor Hollywood. Gimme a break (shout out to Nell Carter!). I’m sure Tim Allen felt better once he dried his tears with bars of gold and St. Angie Jo doesn’t give a shit if The Tourist is trash as long as the check clears.
Well, at least who ever hosts the next award show has some material for their opening monologue. They can make fun of Judd Apatow for making fun of Ricky Gervais for making fun of everybody. We’ll be doing this all year long.
And TMZ asked John Travolta, who was pretty much the butt (wink wink) of Ricky’s gay Scientology joke, what he thought about the GGs. John said it was more like a roast. And the only kind of roast John likes is the kind where he’s got a hard rod in each end, thankyouverymuch!
Here’s John putting more miles on his new wig with his wife Kelly Preston, Olivia Newton-John and John Easterling at the G’Day USA Australia Week Gala in Hollywood, CA.