Despite what you’ve heard, April 29th is not the date of the wedding of the decade. January 27th is! Next Thursday night at Ollie’s Place, a no-kill cat shelter in NYC, Bruno and Solomon will join in holy catrimony, making them the first known married gay feline couple. The raspy meows from crazy cat ladies all over the country will serenade Bruno and Solomon as they periodically nap through the ceremony and then wonder if they are about to be sacrificed since everyone is standing around them in a circle humming out weird shit. You know, just like a human wedding!
The staff and volunteers at Ollie’s Place say that Bruno and Solomon are practically the Laverne & Shirley of cats. They were both brought into the shelter from the streets of Coney Island at about the same time and they immediately bonded. Bruno, the grey cat with a big rack, is shy and a little demure. Solomon, the Creamiscle cat, is more of an alpha male (aka the top) and protects Bruno from the big scary world out there. The shelter knows that Bruno and Solomon shan’t nevah be paw-ted (Maurice shout out!), so this bond will join them as one. Meaning if you want to adopt one ho, you have to take the other one too.
A pre-congrats to Bruno and Solomon! A gay wedding between two fat pussies. YAY! Let’s all sniff a plastic flute filled with catnip in their honor.
via NYC Best Friends