George Clooney was in the Sudan earlier this month to work with the United Nations and Google on ways to prevent a civil war when a blood sucker who doesn’t cocktail at the Palms on the weekend bit into his skin. George caught Malaria, but this isn’t the first time. George’s rep shouted to everyone that he’s going to live and has already made a full recovery.
“George is completely over the Malaria he contracted while in the Sudan during the first week in January. This was his second bout with it. This illustrates how with proper medication, the most lethal condition in Africa, can be reduced to a bad ten days instead of a death sentence.”
George’s rep also failed to mention that while he was in a Malaria haze, Elisabetta Canalis tried to get a local priest to marry them so she could claim half of his fortune. You can’t blame a trick for trying. And really, BIG FUCKING WOW to George. So he caught and beat Malaria twice. Well, I’ve been battling a canker sore in the left side of my mouth for the past two weeks! Everything that goes into my mouth has to make a quick right for processing. I’m basically only using half of my mouth and you know that’s a hard thing for a slut to do. Try that, George…and get fully better, because the Vegas cocktail waitress industry depends on it.
via E! Online