Anne Hathaway Is Catwoman

Jocelyn Wildenstein and Sean Young are both feeling all kinds of vulnerable right now, because they were just robbed by Christopher Nolan! Warner Bros. and Christopher Nolan announced today that Anne Hathaway will play Selina Kyle/Catwoman in The Dark Knight Rises. Michelle Pfeiffer just got into Eartha Kitt’s grave and they rolled together. And their bruises from seeing Halle Berry’s Catwoman were just starting to fully heal.

It was also announced that Tom Hardy will play Bane. The press release from Deadline:

Warner Bros. Pictures announced today that Anne Hathaway has been cast as Selina Kyle in Christopher Nolan’s “The Dark Knight Rises.” She will be starring alongside Christian Bale, who returns in the title role of Bruce Wayne/Batman.
Christopher Nolan stated, “I am thrilled to have the opportunity to work with Anne Hathaway, who will be a fantastic addition to our ensemble as we complete our story.”

In addition, Tom Hardy has been set to play Bane. Nolan said, “I am delighted to be working with Tom again and excited to watch him bring to life our new interpretation of one of Batman’s most formidable enemies.”

Nolan will direct the film from a screenplay he wrote with Jonathan Nolan, from a story by Christopher Nolan and David S. Goyer. Nolan will also produce the film with his longtime producing partner, Emma Thomas, and Charles Roven.
“The Dark Knight Rises” is slated for release on July 20, 2012. The film will be distributed worldwide by Warner Bros. Pictures, a Warner Bros. Entertainment Company.

But but but Anne Hathaway’s face was born to play THE JOKER (or at least Harley Quinn), not Catwoman. You know, I didn’t fully understand it when Heath Ledger was cast as The Joker, so I will save my shade until this mess comes out. I will use that energy on weeping for Sean Young who continues to lose out on the role of her acid dreams.