Insert Fisting Joke Here

January 14, 2011 / Posted by:

Just a few days after debuting his new bundle of lace front joy on the cover of People Magazine, John Travolta brought it to the opening of the Breitling flagship store in NYC last night. The fellow A-list beauties who got to marvel at John’s steam-proof, stick-on wig live and in person included the all-natural Victoria Silvstedt (see below).

Even though I am impressed by John’s Knowles-like dedication to wearing the coats of farm animals on his head, I am completely disappointed that nobody around him has answered the urge to snatch that shit like a scorned Miss Gay Brazil loser. When the wig is so blatant, your fingers get the tingles and you just want to grab and dash! You practically have to solofist yourself to keep this from happening. Hmmm. Maybe that’s John’s intention…… Well. Played.

And John’s new watch is all sorts of fancy, but I hope he remembers to take it off before he goes into the sauna. If he doesn’t, some poor dude will be farting out wheels and screws for months.

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