Paul Cartwright and Nora Battenberg-Cartwright, two baby art students from the University of Worcester in England who followed Johnny Weir’s version of the sanctity of marriage by becoming husband and wife even though she’s straight and he prefers his fuck partners with a little meat on their boners.
Paul and Nora exchanged “Till death (or a hideous pair of shoes) do us parts” in her home country of Germany this past Christmas as part of their newest art project for school. They are united as partners in ART instead of partners in romantical love, and said that their creative partnership will come to an end if they divorce. Somebody has too much Lady CaCa in their lives.
They live together in Worcester, but their genitals have never touched and they are free to get it on with anybody they want. Mr. Cartwright told the Worcester News, “It’s about an artistic unity rather than a love union, to join each other in art and make us the art. It’s a really truthful marriage and we will still see other people.”
Silly damn art students! Always thinking their artistic brains are spitting out unique and edgy ideas. Liza Minnelli, John Travolta and Tom Cruise are the Michelangelos of that artistic medium! Paul and Nora need to bow down to the masters!
But Paul and Nora really get the Hot Slut stamp, because they coordinate their outfits before they leave the house. So every single day they look like members of a gay hipster family of gypsies who raid upholstery warehouses and the dining rooms of old ladies for outfits. And of course, we have to pay homage to Mrs. Marilyn Manson-Cartwright’s eyebrows, which look exactly like the wallpaper border in my auntie’s hall bathroom.
(For Emmerline & Stacey)