Babies Are Taking Over
The season of pregnancy farts is well underway and add Jewel’s to the mix, because she has announced that she’s got a body full of baby and has just entered her second trimester. The Alaskan Renee Zellweger says that she’s so happy she could yodel until her pussy falls off (which would be problematic for when her baby needs to make an exit) and her husband of 2 years Ty Murray is right there with her. Jewel gave the news to People:
“I took a pregnancy test and it was positive! It was so hard to keep it a secret. I was worried I’d start throwing up on set and everyone would be like, ‘Oh, she’s pregnant.’
I have always been a workaholic, so I had to learn how to slow down and take care of myself in a different way. I’m trying to be in the moment and really enjoy my pregnancy. I feel really lucky.”
Sooooo many babies. You know, I’m not going to make a “there must be Duggar ovaries in the water” joke, because there’s always soooo many babies. Especially this time of year, because everyone’s getting jizzed up and basted in the fall.
And whenever I see pictures of Jewel and Ty Murray, I always think of the tragic demise of Squinty Zellweger’s marriage to Kenny Chesney. This could’ve been them! No, it’s for the best. Besides, I’m sure Kenny is having a lot more fun fertilizing prostates.