THE GIFT OF DIVORCE! It was just over a week ago that Ryan Reynolds and ScarJo got peens wagging and chochas chirping at the thought of them back on the market when they announced that they’re splitting up….and now he’s making it official. People says that Ryan filed for divorce this afternoon in Los Angeles. If you’re hoping that Ryan and ScarJo’s divorce will get so filthy dirty that they’ll eventually wrestle naked in a kiddie pool of oil in the middle of a court room, you better pull your pants back up. That’s not going to happen. ScarJo filed her divorce response at the same time, which means they are probably going to play nice. No greasy ScarJo and RyRey nipples for now.
Ryan and ScarJo didn’t get a prenup, but neither is seeking any kind of spousal support. They both list December 14th as the day they decided to take their genitals elsewhere for good.
There’s a million rumors going around as to why their marriage flopped on the sand before dying. Some say that ScarJo treated Ryan like an unwanted dingle, and others say that one of them cheated. But People says that they barely were around each other due to their careers and decided that calling it a day was better than trying to work that shit out.
Well, fuck us all! Two celebrities not chewing each other’s eye balls out during a divorce battle? Something in the eggnog ain’t clean (Ed. note: I don’t anything in eggnog is clean). Maybe Ryan wants to get that shit over with so he can go back to doing ab crunches. Or maybe it’s just a Christmas miracle! A sad Christmas miracle, but still a Christmas miracle.
(Image via Fame Pictures)