The Madge Does Not Wait!
Over the weekend, England was filled with more white powder than the inside of Paris Hilton’s vagina and so the airport situation was like John Travolta’s b-hole after a “pass around patty” sauna orgy: messy and congested. Planes were forced to wait for centuries on the tarmac and some were diverted to Egypt, or some shit. And on one of those planes was the royal one herself MADGE! The Daily Mail says that Madge’s Virgin flight from New York was diverted to London’s Stansted Airport after the pilot was told Heathrow was a no go. When they finally got to Stansted, the plane parked on the tarmac and waited for the overworked ground crew to get to them. You pretty much know what’s coming next.
A passenger says that after they were told it was going to be a while, Madge gave everyone a shot of her vadge while she did yoga in the aisles. And after an hour of that, a bus pulled up to the plane and off went Madge with her 15-piece entourage while the unlucky loser peons waited for another 2 hours on the tarmac. One angry ass passenger put it like this: “It seemed a little unfair — it’s not like she is the President or anything. The rest of us all had to wait for another two hours. Madonna was taken off the plane way before the rest of the first-class people. We were all grumbling about it.”
Those selfish assholes need to eat a dick and shut up! Did they ever think that maybe Madge HAD to be taken off the plane early due to a medical emergency? I mean, if Madge goes too long without vacuum sealing her head for at least 10-minutes, her face will slide off her bones and hit the floor. Do they want that?! And if she doesn’t chew on her daily meal of an orphan child’s heart, her muscles will burst into flames and she’ll burn down like Sodom and Gomorrah. Do those whiny passengers want that on their conscience?! I swear, some assholes only think of themselves. Besides, they know the rule: zombies and children (Baby Brahim was with her) FIRST!
Don’t worry, though, Madge survived that awful ordeal. Here she is leaving a restaurant in London last night with Baby Brahim.