David Schwimmer Is Going To Be Somebody’s Father

December 22, 2010 / Posted by:

David Schwimmer SHOCKED everyone (correction: no one) when he secretly wed his child bride Zoe Buckman back in June. And now he’s SHOCKING everyone (correction: no one) again by announcing that he made his first pregnant with Zoe. The baby, who will have a face longer than an Afghan Hound staring into a fun house mirror, is coming out sometime next spring. The earth-shattering details from People:

The actor and wife Zoe Buckman, who wed in June in a private ceremony, will be first-time parents, his rep confirms to PEOPLE, who adds that the two “couldn’t be more thrilled.”

Now David can have a Friends play date….while Matthew Perry and Jennifer Aniston sit at the bar by themselves and he softly pats her on the top of the head as she spews out lonely tears into her dirty martini at the sound of all the children laughing. Oh, but seriously, who cares? I doubt even Jennifer Aniston cares about this news. She would rather watch a video of a dumb cat slapping at her own reflection. Ask you shall receive, Aniston:

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