The male jewel beetles of Australia who are so hard up that they’ve been caught humping on beer bottles together. Yup, an all-dude orgy fueled by beer. Male jewel beetles are just like us! But at least they don’t have to go to the emergency room and use the “I accidentally sat on it” excuse when the beer bottles get stuck.
Researchers say that there’s a lot of lonely beetle snatch in Australia, because the males waddle by the females and head directly to the beer bottles. They think the dude beetles get boners for the sun-glistened bumps on the bottom of the bottle and mistake that shit for a female. Researchers are concerned, because if the jewel beetles continue to fuck on beer bottles instead of females, it could cause problems for other species. Well, maybe once researchers find a cure for that shit they can share it with the world. I’m sure there’s a lot of females with frustrated vaginas out there, because their dudes would rather suck on a beer bottle with his friends than hump on them.