On Thursday, Josh Duhamel was kicked off of a plane and put in time out without his toys after he threw a tantrum and refused to turn off his stupid ass BlackBerry. Josh wasted everyone’s time by holding up a flight to Kentucky for nearly 90 minutes. Yes, 90 minutes! You know what those passengers could’ve done with those 90 minutes instead of sitting on the tarmac waiting for flight attendants to pop an annoying bag of hemorrhoids and pry him off the plane? They could’ve tap danced in an airport bathroom for some pre-flight peen. They could’ve read every tabloid cover-to-cover in a Hudson News. They could’ve swallowed a few Airborne and vodka shots in the terminal bar. But no, they had to wait a douchefart’s pouty party of one to be over.
Josh’s rep later burped out a “He’s sowwy” statement. And at the TREVOR Live Benefit in Los Angeles last night, Josh told Access Hollywood (via People) that he’s learned his lesson and will turn off his BlackBerry from now on. Josh had this to say, “I’ve learned that it’s best to always turn them off. It was not my favorite moment. I’m good. Lesson learned.”
So, Josh has barely learned that sometimes it’s best to listen to adults with authority who have name tags on their uniforms (name tags are important)? Gold star for him! I wonder what new and exciting lessons Josh will learn next! Maybe he’ll finally learn that wiping his own ass prevents skid marks on his Underoos. Seriously, Fergie is totally over scrubbing the nasty butt rainbows out of Josh’s chonies after scrubbing the piss stains out of hers. Learn this, Josh!