And he even covered the table with Saran Wrap! And he brought a cup of your favorite flavor of lube (that’s not coffee)! And AND he’s got his camera phone out ready to document all the dicking and debauchery for his Xtube account. That Tom Hardy thinks of everything.
The real truth according to The Globe and Mail is that Tom Hardy threw himself on the table at Vancouver’s Darkday Studios so that tattoo artist Brian Glatiotis could ink a Union Jack over one of his juicy chest cutlets. Tom could get his own exhibit at the Museum of Tragic Tattoos, but that’s part of his charm. If it wasn’t for those tats, he wouldn’t look like a recently sprung ex-con who earns his child support payments by dancing for old dudes in a porn shop off the highway.