They Don’t Call Him Johnny Rotten For Nothing

File this under: THE STORY OF THE YEAR! Jay Kay of Jamiroquai and Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols were sitting next to each other in business class on a flight to Australia when shit went down. Or should I say, when shit went out in cloud form. Jay Kay tells The Sun that the foul, dirty, disgusting, throat-choking, lash-singe-ing farts that came out of Johnny Rotten made the oxygen masks shake and the flight attendants stick their heads out of the emergency door for fresh air. According to Jay Kay, Johnny Rotten’s a-hole basically bombed out a terrorist threat.

“He is a fucking nuisance. I was seated next to him on a flight and the whole trip he just kept farting. It was totally foul.

He kept saying, ‘Oh, that wasn’t me’ or, ‘The meal smells a bit off, don’t you think?’ He drove me insane.”

Jay Kay says that he would rather endure the torture of coach than breathe in Johnny Rotten’s butt sneezes again:

“At least I’d be able to breathe a bit. They banned smoking in the air and they should ban farting.”

What does Jay Kay expect Johnny Rotten to smell like? Bunnies made from gardenias bouncing around in baby powder?! It’s Johnny Rotten! I’d file a complaint if he didn’t inflate the under seat life vests with his farts. I really hope that Johnny Rotten’s gas follows Jay Kay around for the rest of his days, because bitch is funny when he gets angry over farts.