Here I was thinking that Randy and Evi Quaid were hiding out in some stranger’s garden shed in Bakersfield and surviving on hose water, bird seed and crab grass. But no, Cousin Eddie and his Bride of Batshitcrazystein came up with this idea that they’d seek refuge in Canada. Well, guess the hell what? As soon as they got to the border in Vancouver, a giant net fell on top of them. The jig fucked ’em in the face and not in a good way.
The Quaids are wanted in California after they didn’t show their faces in a court room to answer to the charges of being CRAZY. E! Online reports that the two are set to appear at a detention hearing this afternoon before they get thrown back into the loving arms of the US.
You know what I want to know? Did Randy and Evi use their real passports? They are the beacon of crazy, so I’m hoping they tried to use an old Donald Duck passport they bought in a Salvation Army on their way to the border. Or maybe they used some random baby’s (babies usually don’t have arrest warrants out on them) passport they printed off the Internet at a Kinko’s. If they didn’t, I will be very disappointed. Actually, I’m already disappointed with them, because true crazies would’ve tried to smuggle themselves into Canada by hiding under Justin Bieber’s bangs.
(Thanks to all who sent this in)