To some, the thought of Kim Kardashian making John Mayer scream for 911 while 69ng doesn’t make much sense since his David Duke dick directly goes against everything she truly believes in (example: delicious black peen). But lay a thought on that for a second. This makes so much sense, because Kim would fuck a wombat if it got her a blurb in Life & Style and John Mayer would fuck a wombat just because. No offense to wombats.
The wombats need to blame it on Page Six, because they are the ones starting this. A source tells them that Kim and John recently went out on a group date together while she’s in the city shooting her show, “They brought along other friends, but the idea was to see if they would hit it off.” No word yet if they “hit it off” or not since reps for the both of them had nothing to say about this shit.
By the time I hit publish on this post, Kim probably already rinsed John’s douche dingles out of her mouth and has already moved on to the next piece. Kris Jenner will not let it go beyond that. Once Kris checks John’s credit and adds up all his assets, she’ll find that he doesn’t make nearly enough to keep the entire Kardashian family as plastic as his favorite butt plug. NO GO