Hot Slut Of The Day!

October 20, 2010 / Posted by:

Katherine Chloé Cahoon, a Vanderbilt graduate with the hair of a Cocker Spaniel after a blow out and the wisdom of Romy & Michele who is teaching single girls how to meet European men. You would think all you would need is a working vagina and a plane ticket to Europe, but there’s more to it than that! Here’s a short description from Amazon on why Katherine is an authority on meeting European men. I’m sold:

While enrolled at Vanderbilt University, Katherine Chloé Cahoon spent summers studying in Europe. Each fall when she returned to school her girlfriends wanted to know about the European men she had met, so she started writing. This guide was the result of her efforts. Cahoon is currently working with producers on the screenplay of the book, which they refer to as Sex and the City meets Love Actually in the hot spots of Europe.

Katherine has turned chapters from her guide into educational videos which can be found in the FRESH FUCKERY section of your local library. In the clip below, Katherine gives single girls a dozen reasons for why they would want to meet European men (examples: they have blue eyes and Lance Armstrong bodies). If an animatronic Rumer Willis hosted a public access dating show as the TV version of Cher Horowitz, it would look just like this mess:

The outfits straight from the dressing room cast-off bin in a Nordstrom Rack circa 2000! The hair which you know she brushes 200 times every night in front of the same princess mirror she had in her room as a child! And the smile! The pasted on smile that a young girl might throw at you to lure you into HOSTEL where your brains will be hacked into a million pieces by a Japanese business man. Oh, she’s good.

And in this clip below, Katherine teaches us how to steal beer from European men to give to other European men. This scheme only works if you don’t fucking drink beer!

And not only does Katherine not drink the sweet nectar, but she doesn’t drink any kind of liquid. She can’t, because she’s a damn robot! A graceful and worldly robot, but still a robot!

via Videogum

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