Jon Grosselin’s Asshole Is Still Chapped

October 15, 2010 / Posted by:

First of all, I apologize for throwing Jon Gosselin at your eyes again since I’m sure you’ve spent a lot of time and money successfully exorcising him out of head. The refund line starts to the left. You’ll have to figure out for yourself if I meant my left or your left. Second of all, earlier I wrote about how someone really needs to drag Michael Lohan to the career center. Well, that somebody needs to pick up Jon Gosselin on the way, because the douchebag just wrote a really long open letter to nobody in particular about how he won’t stop until his child army is pulled away from the cameras.

Yeah, wah wah wah-ing into his empty checking account again and it’s a shame that all of us have to hear the echo. Anyways, here’s Jon:

As you may or may not be aware, I have been working for some time to remove my children from television. I do not believe being on TV is beneficial to any of them. They are no longer toddlers that are oblivious to what is going on around them. They are now six and ten, in school and desperately in need of a normal life.

Each of them has experienced negative effects of having their lives so public. Some are struggling with emotional and/or behavioral issues. My goal for my children is for them to have a normal childhood, and gain back their much deserved privacy. This is not about money, this is about my children. No amount of money is worth the price my children are paying. You cannot put a price on childhood. Money comes and goes, but you only have one childhood.

For those questions about money and support, I can say I am supporting my children to the best of my ability. All parties involved know the truth about this. I am and have been actively seeking employment. I have been barred from accepting entertainment deals that would generate income for my family due to contractual obligations. I am also actively looking for a job outside of the entertainment industry and so far, have not secured a position. In the mean time, I have been focusing on spending time with my children and providing a safe, stable, normal and private environment for them!

On October 13, 2010, I went to court to act in the best interest of my children- to remove them from television. The judge respectfully denied my plea, and granted filming rights to their mother. I honor the judge’s decision, but I do not support it. I will not stop fighting to remove my children from television. It is not a child’s job to support themselves, or a lifestyle, they need to be kids. I would like to apologize to my friends, family, and especially my children for not taking a stand earlier in my life and not questioning my decisions to have our lives documented and displayed. I will have to answer to my children for the rest of my life. I will have to live with this guilt the rest of my life. I am truly sorry!

If you read this letter backwards really quick it says: “But I’ll shut my cake hole if you give me a cut.” To which the Gosselin kids responded with: “Bitch, get off our money!

Jon makes some good points (ugh), but it’s a little too late now and besides his kids are going to need that money for their future. And by that I mean they’re going to need it for therapy, an open bar tab and relocation services.

via UsWeekly

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