Even rich people who live in fancy mansions have neighbors who are always trying to kill their good time! Case in point: Katherine Heigl and her husband Josh Kelley were marinating in their hot tub on Monday night when their problem neighbor started filling their backyard with all kinds of insults (fictional examples: “Shut your ash tray of a mouth, Hagel!” and “Your loud mouth is bombing my damn ear holes just like your movie is bombing at the box office!” etc.. etc..). Basically, Hagel’s neighbors thought her and her husband were too loud.
TMZ says that Hagel’s neighbors have a history of acting like assholes so her bodyguard called up 911. The cops showed up, talked to everyone involved, realized that shit was a waste of their time and left without making an arrest or issuing a ticket.
You’re probably thinking that Hagel and her husband must be moaners, but I doubt those kind of noises were coming from their mouths. I’m sure Hagel was doing her usual: complaining about everything. Hagel complained that her skin was not properly being titillated, because the jacuzzi’s bubbles were not bubbly enough. Hagel bitched that they need to go back to bubble school to learn how to bubble the right way. Then when the neighbors starting telling her off, she complained that their weak and uncreative insults weren’t even making her angry. Bitch got mad that they weren’t making her mad! Hagel was overheard complaining, “I did not feel that I was given the material to warrant an angryface…”
But seriously, who calls the cops on an annoying neighbor? That’s not how you deal with a buzz-killing neighbor. You throw a ham at them! Learn from Sharon Osbourne!