Everybody Run! The Beauty Queen’s Got A Sharpie!
Every woman should carry a Sharpie in her purse, right next to a bedazzled personal taser gun and a ribbed penis sleeve (in case your one night stand’s dick situation needs a little dressing up). Not only can you use a Sharpie to paint an archway of exquisite glamour over your eyes, but you can also use it to stab a bitch in the neck when they aren’t cooperating! This is what the first Miss Kentucky Latina used her Sharpie for at a gas station in Richmond, Kentucky last week. I guess “Sharpie-ing a ho in the froat” is Miss Kentucky Latina’s first official order of business. Curtsy before the crazy before you get cut!
WHAS11.com reports that 22-year-old Daniela Gaskie got into it with a gas station employee before stabbing him in the neck with her royal scepter. The toxic Sharpie fumes must have raised her crazy to a fever pitch, because that bitch ran across the street and started beating on her own car! SHARPIE RAMPAGE!
An employee from a nearby pharmacy came outside to ask Miss Kentucky Latina why she was committing auto abuse. Wrong move. Miss Crazy Bitch 20010 turned her rage onto the pharmacy employee and started beating that poor thing! The cops finally arrived and dragged her off to jail. She was charged with assault, disorderly conduct and criminal mischief. She also lost her crown.
But who needs that shit anyways? I’m sure there’s a group of softcore cholas somewhere who will gladly crown her Miss Cholita Queen because of her weapon of choice. And they won’t even need to jump her in!
And please tell me that’s her mug shot. Fresh lipstick, not a hair out of place and smudge-free pristine eyebrows… You can take her crown, but you can’t take her beauty!
(Thanks Heather)