Kiss Of The Spidermess

Leave it to Ty Ty Banks to take a pair of five cent fish nets from the store and wrap that mess around her head as though it was a piece of fine couture crafted from the hands of angel Coco Chanel herself. The Deadliest Catch indeed! No really, Ty Ty straight-up shoved her HD head into a pair of fishnets and cut the ends off. She gave herself a pat on the back for this shit on her Twitter:

So FRENCH VOGUE mask is sum cheap FISHNET stockings I got n crazy store n Paris! I cut em up n made it y’all. N did my ow hair n makeup.

Note to self: If I ever need a pair of fishnets in Paris, go to the CRAZIEST store. While I do appreciate Ty Ty’s MacGyver-like skills, she looks like a Christmas ham to me. The kind of ham that when you peel back the foil, you find that it has already spoiled so you don’t even cut the netting off. You immediately take it back to Food 4 Less for a store credit.

Besides, Marilyn Manson did it better:

I mean, how did Ty Ty even eat or drink? Somebody please tell me there’s a picture of Ty Ty shoving a slice of steak in between her fishnet holes. Make it work, Ty Ty! Oh wait, that’s the wrong show. Drecktitude, Ty Ry, drecktitude!

And here’s a few more pictures from Vogue’s 90th anniversary party in Paris last night: The First Lady of CRAZY, Jean Paul Gaultier, Jeremy Scott, Dita Von Teese, Zac Posen with Diane von Furstenberg, Marc Jacobs, Gis Bundchen, and the perpetually tanked Kate Moss.