Shia LaBeouf has this recurring nightmare where Frankie Muniz is the one who kisses Megan Fox in Transformers, and Frankie Muniz is the one who gets to ride bareback on Harrison Ford’s bike in Indiana Jones, and Frankie Muniz is the one who HAS HIS LIFE! Then Shia shoots up in bed with sweat beads filling his ass crack and quickly looks over at the Daytime Emmy Award on his night stand to make sure it reads “Outstanding Performer in a Children’s Series – Shia LaBeouf for Even Stevens.” And it does so he lays back down and goes to spoon his girlfriend, but as she turns he around he sees FRANKIE MUNIZ’S FACE over hers. Frankie Muniz, DAMN YOU!
But seriously, did you know that Shia and Frankie Fucking Muniz are in a major feud? Like Shia hates Frankie so much that he punches himself in the ears every time he hears the words Frankie, Malcolm, Cody or Banks. It’s serious. Popeater says it started back in 2003 when Frankie bought the last pack of He-Man Underoos right from under Shia at KMart. No, apparently it started because Shia says that Frankie has always looked down at him. Back in 2003, Shia told Entertainment Weekly, “I used to see him at premieres and stuff and it would always be like he was looking down on me, and then it turned into we’re equal, and then it turned into ‘Oh Frankie, I know that guy.”
Well, LaDouche kept the bitch fight going yesterday during a radio interview with The Bert Show. The host stroked Shia’s tampon a bit by saying that he’s been in six #1 movies in a row. Shia kicked Frankie Muniz in the ass bone with his response, “While that’s flattering as hell, you could have put Frankie Muniz into any of the movies I’ve been in and it would’ve still been No.1.”
Burn? Burn. Burn? Who knows, but Frankie felt it and hit back at Shia on Twitter:
Dear Shia Labeouf. It’s getting creepy the fact that you can’t stop talking about me. It’s been 12 years now. I don’t know you. Thanks.
11:55 AM Sep 30th via web
This is some “fighting over the top bunk” shit that really should be resolved with a game of Double Dare (hosted by Marc Summers, of course).