Since Fishsticks Paltrow is a fine English lady who only runs in the most prestigious social circles in her native land, you would think she’d have a private box at The Ascot and a stable full of thoroughbred horses with pretentious as fuck names. But no, she doesn’t! That’s because Fishy has HATE in her gills for horses. Fishy made her intense hate for horses known when talking about her daughter Apple to Vogue UK (via HuffPo):
“She loves riding – she competed in her first horse show the other day and won second place. Well of course I was thrilled for her -but it’s incredible because I hate horses and have nothing really to do with them. The other day I actually sent Stella (McCartney) a picture because there was Apple, just sitting on her horse, wearing a pineapple T-shirt. I just texted her saying, ‘surely this is your child?’. It’s amazing – she’s a vegetarian, she adores animals, everything – she and Stella have really bonded.”
And with that, I can announce that horses are having the best week ever! They never have to worry about Fishy wanting to ride them or invite them over for afternoon organic tea!!! Trace Cyrus better grab SJP to kick up their hooves together at this happy news. This is kind of the news that will make a horse want to fuck a fly and kiss a snake!