Here’s Brit Brit’s rent-to-own boyfriend Jason Trawick taking his oiled up parts for a walk in Hawaii yesterday, and since we have him here we should answer the question you should always ask yourself whenever you see a legal piece with the kind of genitals you crave: WOULD YOU HIT IT?
You know, Jason is a strange one. Dude is like that one night trick you take home who takes off all his clothes for the first time and gives you a body you weren’t expecting. You check your receipts to make sure you brought home the right bitch and everything. When I first saw pictures of Jason with his nipples out, I was a little surprised because I didn’t expect him to be as ripped as Kirstie Alley’s chonies after a fart (sorry).
It’s like if Sam Trammell was about to start shooting a remake of The Machinist and we caught him halfway through his manorexic transformation. Or if you stopped Sam Merlotte right after he began shapeshifting into Benjamin Button. So yeah, I’d hit it.
You know Brit Brit gets all slobbery for his abs too. And not because they are all muscly and shit. No. If she pretends she’s at the food court, they look like a Cinnabon six-pack before getting frosted. I’m not going to make two sexual frosting jokes in a row (see post below), so you’ll have to do this one yourself.