With a hair yarmulke on top of his head and touches of silver hanging onto his beard, George Michael strolled into the Highbury Corner Magistrates Court in London this morning to plead “Yup, I Fucked Up” to the charges that he drove while under the influence of weed. George was busted last month after his Range Rover violently assaulted a Snappy Snaps photo shop by busting into that bitch. The cops found George stoned as all fuck.
AP reports that George admitted to the judge that he had the good shit waltzing through his system at the time of the crash and he accepted all responsibility for his actions. The judge took George’s tiny hand in his and then slapped it before suspending his drivers license for six months. The judge warned George that he could face time in the chokey if he’s arrested again, “It is a serious matter. Your driving was extremely poor and there was an accident.”
George barely got his drivers license back last year. It was snatched away from him in 2007 after he was found BROKE OFF, DOZED OFF behind the wheel of his car.
George and every single judge in the UK just need to come to the blatant realization that BITCH CAN’T DRIVE. Does George need Tai from Clueless to rise from the dead and tell him this to his face so he finally gets it? My sister, who once hit a parked car and made a left turn over a center divider, is a better driver than George and that’s saying everything. George was meant to be a professional passenger, that’s all. Run (don’t drive) and tell that!
But George’s day wasn’t totally filled with misery and hand slaps. I mean, look at him mentally masturbating while surrounded by a trio of hot cops!