“Sookeh Iz Mahn….Like Legally And Shit”

August 22, 2010 / Posted by:

Pop the sparkling True Blood (or just add a drop of soda water to your Sunday Bloody Mary), because Sooookeh and Beeeeeeehl Compton went and got married! To each other! That means your religious grandma doesn’t have to hide her eyes with a bible when Sookeh and Beehl hump the crotch patches off each other in True Blood, because they married now. Yay! We can all enjoy Sookeh and Beehl’s bloody fuck scenes together now!

UsWeekly says that Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer became husband and wife last night at a private house in Malibu in front of friends and family including Elijah Wood, Denis O’Hare, Alan Ball, Carrie Preston and her husband Ben Linus from Lost. Yes, this confirms that Ben Linus is EVERYWHERE. You’re not just seeing things.

This is the first marriage (I think) for both Anna and Stephen. Stephen has two chirruns from two previous relationships.

There aren’t many details on Sookeh and Beehl’s wedding, but the only thing I want to know is if Lafayette was the flower gay and gave shade down the aisle while throwing deep fried onion blossoms from Merlotte’s as Tara’s mom and Randi Sue hummed the wedding song.

Oh and somebody should let People Magazine know that when they buy the TOTALLY EXCLUSIVE pictures from Sookeh and Beehl’s wedding, they should just use a half-naked picture of ASkars as their cover. That’s all anybody (aka probably just me) wants to see anyways. They can have him cover up his downtown Swedish dreamland with a ring bearer’s pillow to give it that wedding feel.

UPDATE: Here’s some crystal clear pictures of Stephen Moyer and some of his guests running into the ocean after he got married. And are the two chicks in the band doing the robot? This wedding….

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